The Price of Love

Chapter 14: If

Jin

"My God, Jin!" she exclaimed. "Protect me? You make them sound like predators!"

"In a way, that's what they are," I replied. "My father already told me he wants to meet you at dinner, but I don't think it's a good idea. That's why I think you should stay here. With me."

She stared at me. "Here? You mean in your room?" When I nodded, her eyes went wide. Then she shook her head. "You can't be serious! That would be highly improper! Jin, I haven't even been introduced to your father! How can I just stay here with you in your room in his house? I can't! We can't do that! It will make me look bad!"

I wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "Wait! Calm down. Hear me out."

"If that's why you asked me to come here, then I am leaving! You seriously just want me to stay in your bed--no, Seokjin! This is too much!"

I dropped my arm away from her. "Okay, okay. Please. I'm sorry. Baby, I'm sorry. That is not what I meant at all. I will have the maids take you to a guest room." I tried to pull her back into a hug, but she resisted. "Bella, please. I said I was sorry. It was never my intention to make you feel this way. How many times do I have to tell you that you mean the world to me? What we have is not about sex, my love." I shrugged. "Sure, that's really good between us--"

She was about to erupt in anger again, so I quickly continued talking.

"--but it's only because of how much we love each other," I finished. "I just wanted to spare you any problems with my father or his wife. I don't want them to hurt your feelings in any way. You have no idea--" he paused a beat. " I just wanted to protect you. Hide you. Please. Forgive me. I never meant to insult you. I would do anything to protect you, I swear. If I end up getting hurt...or whatever, I wouldn't mind. But I couldn't bear it if you were angry with me."

She took a breath, seemingly mollified. "Okay. I guess I overreacted. I'm sorry. I just want your father to like me."

I nodded once, thinking about how that wouldn't matter to him in the face of his schemes. My father would probably like her, but it would not change his mind about the arranged marriage. I walked over to the nightstand next to my bed and pressed a button on the intercom.

"This is Seokjin. I need a room made up for my guest, Miss Domani."

"Of course, sir," the voice replied. "The Blossom room will be ready in twenty minutes."

I turned to Bella with my eyebrows raised. "Okay. Better?"

I sank down on the divan next to her. "I'm so happy you're here." I leaned my head on her shoulder. "It's strange, but I can honestly say that you're the only female who has shown me love and care since my mother--and you know that didn't last very long. I had pretty much lost hope of finding someone who loved me for me. I regret all the time I wasted with random girls and...sorry. And my relationships--well, disaster is too good a word for them."

"Jin, I'm sorry," she whispered. "I wish you'd never had to go through that."

I sighed. "For the longest time now, I've thought about what it would be like to be part of a real family, with love and laughter and all that--all the things I didn't have. One day when I'm a father, I plan to show my kids all the love I can. I will probably smother them with affection."

Her face split in a big smile. "Yes, I can definitely see that. Your inner child will be so happy playing with your own children."

"Our children?" I asked softly.

She bit her lip. "Uh...one day, I-I suppose."

I gulped. "That's not what you want?" My mind couldn't help flashing back to my ex-fiancee and how she had freaked out over marriage and children.

"Yes, I suppose," she repeated, "but in the future. You know that I still have things to accomplish, goals I want to reach." She must have seen my crestfallen expression because she reached out her hands and cupped my face. "Oh, sweetie, I didn't mean to make you sad. I don't mean that I never want those things. I do want a family with you, but, of course, all that is still in the distant future, right? We still have plenty of time."

I nodded. "I hope so, Bella. I hope you mean that and not change your mind like...well, like..." I couldn't say the words.

She leaned toward me and kissed my cheek. "Of course not like that woman who broke your heart, Jin. She was awful."

"I should've known better," I muttered. "I was such a gullible fool."

"You were young," she said, "and you craved affection. She took advantage of that, and I'm sorry you had to go through that. I wish I could've been there for you from the beginning."

"If you had been with me from the beginning, maybe I'd have been an ass and not appreciated you the way I do now. Having lived through that hell reminds me that being with you is like being in heaven," he said. "But I have you now, darling. You're the only one I can count on," I continued. "I would be so lost without you. Incomplete."

Her hands reached out and pulled my face to hers. She kissed me sweetly on the lips then smiled. "I'm here, my love, and you can always count on me. I know how much it must've hurt you when your mother left you. I saw the expression on your face when you saw me with my mom over Christmas. It almost broke my heart, but you know that I'm here for you. My mom wants you to feel comfortable with her."

"I am so thankful for the way she treats me. It's nice to feel a mother's love again. I do love her, you know, and I will always look out for her and protect her with my life."

She pulled away from me and looked at me questioningly. "Jin, what are you talking about? Why do you have to protect my mother?" Her cute lips were turned slightly down into a pout. "Don't tell me you have a crush on my mom?"

I laughed and kissed her cheek. "Don't be jealous. She is beautiful, but it's just an expression. I just meant that I would do anything to make sure that your family--and you--are okay. I love you. All of you."

She smiled. "That's just the sweetest thing ever, Jinnie. Thank you for saying that. I appreciate it. That's why I will always stay with you."

I hugged her again. "Maybe I can just keep you here," I whispered into her hair. "We don't have to have dinner with my family. We can just stay here. Just the two of us."

"Jin," she whined. "Stop acting so strangely. Everything will be fine. No matter what happens, how bad dinner might go, I will still love you."

I barely let her finish her statement before I crushed my lips to hers in a needy kiss. "Promise me that you will remember that," I said, looking into her eyes. "Promise!"

She blinked a few times as if confused, then smiled. "Of course! I love you."

I hugged her tightly. If only I could tell her what was going on. If I could find a way to change everything. If only I was smart enough to avoid this situation.

I kissed her gently this time, pouring my soul into her. If my arms could protect her from what was coming, I would hold her for eternity. But I couldn't do either.