vacancy screams from my bedroom door | lil peep

11 | the house plant died

ava was home still, she didn't do much though. she spent most of her days in bed, occasionally getting up to shower or eat. her dresser was covered in dished and her floor was scattered with dirty laundry. she had hardly spoken to gus since she left, and hadn't talked to smoke, tracy or even audrey in a few weeks. she deleted social media from her phone, seeing all of those videos of gus completely fucked up hurt her too much. she wanted to snap her fingers and make it all better, but there was no winning here. she had learned the hard way that you can't help someone who doesn't want help. 

she hadn't given up on gus, but she had no idea what to do when he came home. gus had gone farther downhill since ava left, he performed and spent the rest of his time writing and getting high by himself. he had texted ava a few times but never got an answer, he gave up hope. he had 2 shows left on tour, 2 days until he could go back home to ava. 

gus' friends had become increasingly worried about him. gus knew he was in the wrong direction, he knew he needed help. but after all of this, he was scared to tell anyone he wanted it. over the course of the rest of the tour gus had bleached his hair back to blonde, he had also gotten a new tattoo for ava. she had left him a note one morning when she had to go out while he was still asleep, so he took her writing from that and got it inked on his inner forearm. 'be back soon, i love you! ava <3' 

ava missed gus so fucking much. she felt like she was losing him and it was her fault. she was the one who left. she was the one not talking to him. she was letting him fall through the cracks of her hands. she had no right to be upset. right? 

there was something she though of that would make getting out of bed worth it, to feel like she was with him again. 

ava

can i sleep in ur bed tonight 

i'll clean up before ur home

gus

yes

u can stay until i'm home 

gus smiled for the first time in a long time when his phone lit up with ava's name. of course she could stay, he hoped she would until he was home. 

ava thought about it, maybe she would stay. she decided she'd see how she feels after tonight. ava packed a small bag to bring to gus' apartment with her. when she arrived she felt a rush of comforting nostalgia seeing the inside of gus' apartment. the air smelt stale, the surfaces were covered in dust and the house plant died. ava put her stuff down to open the curtains and crack a window open to let some fresh air in. she grabbed a duster to wipe off the tables and such so it was clean for gus to come home too. 

she smiled walking in his room, he had photos of them taped to the mirror and she noticed the empty cup on the windowsill that read hello sunshine  :) , she had given him that cup only the second time she ever saw him. she was surprised he kept it so long. she tidied the place up a little and went out to restock the fridge for him, it was the least she could do. 

by the time she arrived back it was night time, she changed into some of gus' leftover clothes he didn't bring with him and crawled into bed. it felt much bigger without him in it, but she didn't like the feeling any better. she had fallen asleep the easiest she had in a long time. maybe she should have just stayed with him. she regretted it the second she left, things could have been different. 

gus finished his show that night, only 1 more he thought. 1 more show and he would be home. gus stayed with his friends that night, like he did at the start. he knew the end so he might as well try and enjoy it one more time. "have you heard from ava at all recently?" smoke asked gus, he was getting worried after a few weeks of no contact. "for the first time in a while today, shes staying at my place right now" gus told him. "that's happy, is she gonna be there when you get back?" smoke asked. "i hope so" gus said. 

ava decided to stay. she felt a touch better staying at gus' place. it felt like she was closer to him. all she had to do was stay and all the pain she caused herself could have been avoided, but she didn't feel much better on tour. she couldn't stop being angry at herself for having no good option. this was her fault. she had no idea what gus was like right now, she hadn't seen him in person in almost 2 months and hadn't even seen a recent photo or video of him in weeks. maybe he would have been okay if she stayed. 

smoke

please be there when he gets home, he needs you so badly right now

ava

i will

tell him i miss him

and love him

smoke

tell him yourself

he needs to hear it from you

ava

i miss you

and i love you

gus hadn't heard those words in so long. he felt like his heart was gonna explode. 

gus

i love you

and i miss you

so much 

i need you

i'm coming home for you soon

wait right there

i'll be back in the morning

gus didn't have it in him to be mad at her for leaving anymore, he just wanted to be back with her and hold her again. she was forgiven. gus and ava both rested easier knowing they would be together again soon. ava promised as long as she lived nothing would ever happen like this again, and she'd be by gus' side for the rest of his life no matter what he did. 

a/n 

boom i did it another chapter bc i love yall

what are u guys thinking now so far?

chapter question: what's ur fav colour? mine are red and pink