it was 3 in the morning, smoke had dropped off gus on his doorstep. gus rifled through his pockets, "shit i don't have any keys" he said to himself, he knocked loudly on the door a few times to try and wake ava up. "it's just me" he said, realizing he probably just scared the shit out of her. gus stood waiting at the door, rocking unsteadily on his feet. he shouldn't have come home high, hopefully ava would be too tired to notice. he heard her quietly moving around in the apartment from the dead silent hallway.
ava cracked the door open, "it's 3am i thought you were coming home in the morning?" ava asked, still pretty much asleep. "it technically is the morning" gus told her. gus kicked his luggage in the door and closed it behind them. ava threw her arms around gus' neck, i'm sorry" she said. gus just held her in silence for a minute, "no, i'm sorry" gus told her. gus was right where he needed to be right now. they were both too tired to say much right now, just enjoying being in each others embrace once again. "i like your new hair" ava told gus, "thank you, i have something i have to show you too" gus told her, going to flick on the light.
he pulled up his sleeve, showing the new tattoo to ava. "i got it for you" he told her, "i love it" she told him "and i love you" she said. she looked at up at him, "i don't wanna be apart from you that long ever again" she told him. "neither do i" he told her. ava looked at him again, noticing his pupils were basically the size of planets. gus could tell that she knew now, he didn't say anything. "gus..." ava said, disappointment heavy in her voice. she walked back to the bedroom, gus following her down the dimly lit hallway. she sat cross legged on the bed, waiting for gus to do, say, or explain something. he curled up in a ball on the bed with his head in her lap. ava ran her fingers gently through his now fluffy blonde hair. they were both silent, nothing but the distant sound of the cars on the freeway could be heard.
"i need help" gus said, his voice cracking. a few tears rolling down his tattooed cheek, leaving dark spots on ava's grey sweatpants. ava had been waiting so long to hear him say those three words. a wave of relief washed over her, knowing she could help gus. "anything you need, i will get, or make happen. i'll be right by your side the whole time" ava told him, she wouldn't let him down again. "are you gonna ship me off to rehab?" gus asked, a tone of fear in his voice. "not unless that's what you want" ava told him "no" he whispered.
gus reached into his pocket and pulled out a little bag of white powder and a little bag of pills, "get rid of these" he said, handing them to ava. she and gus walked to the bathroom and she dumped them in the toilet, letting gus flush them away. "this is good" she said, "the first step to solving a problem is admitting that you have a problem" she told him. gus hugged her, she rubbed his back gently. gus wasn't sure what to do now, realizing he just flushed his main coping mechanism down the toilet, literally.
"baby, when i'm clean i'm gonna do something big for you. i promise. it's a surprise but it's gonna be worth it for both of us" gus told her, ava had no clue what he could be talking about but whatever motivated him was a good thing. "i'll be waiting" she told him. "babe do you not think you should go to some sort of rehab facility, not one where you like actually stay there. but just like appointments? some sort of detox? it isn't much better for you or your body to go cold turkey, i read about people having seizures and other extreme effects from withdrawals" ava asked gus, only wanting the best for him.
"you're probably right, if you think i should i will" gus said, he was gonna try and do what ava suggested, she was the one in her right mind here "okay, i'll call a few places tomorrow" she told him.
"i know this isn't gonna be easy, and that's okay. i know there's possibility for relapse or slip ups but that's okay, you're trying now and you don't even know how happy it makes me" ava told gus. "as long as i got you" he told her, "i'll be right here" she said.
"can we sleep? i'm exhausted" gus asked her , "yes please" ava yawned, the only thing she was okay with waking her up at 3am is gus. "i missed this" gus told her, finally feeling her laying next to him in bed "so did i, being on the road wasn't all it was hyped up to be" ava told him, "i know, if i ever do it again i promise it'll be different" gus told ava. she just nodded sleepily, already falling asleep.
"goodnight aves" gus told her, brushing her hair away from her sleeping face. "i love you, i don't deserve you, i know i'm the worst" he told her.
gus hurt ava, but she hurt him as well. neither of them felt right putting the other in the wrong. they would get better together, and be there for each other. nothing would come between them again, today was the first day of the rest of their relationship and things would be different from now on. unfortunately it took the events that occurred to get them to this point.
a/n
things r a changing
chapter question : what's are ur fav jolly rancher flavours in order, it's for science. mine are cherry, grape, blue raspberry, watermelon, green apple
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vacancy screams from my bedroom door | lil peep
Fanfiction-"now that i'm back on the road, you're in your bed all alone"
