Fall For Me // dreamnotfound

::21::

tw// self harm, mentions of eating disorder, violence/aggression, mentions of drugs/alcohol, suicidal thoughts, homophobia (slurs) (i'm sorry in advance)

George's week was absolute hell.

Over the weekend the brunette hadn't done anything, still in shock and disbelief over Friday night's events. He had gotten no sleep, his thoughts were clouded with Dream and what he had seen at the party. Each night he waits for a text from Dream, anything, to show that he might have regretted what he said and feels sorry. But he gets nothing. No message, nothing at all.

Monday has George questioning whether he's good enough or not. The brunette skips school that day, not having the energy to get out of bed and walk around for that long. So instead, he mopes around at home with a loosely fitting t shirt and sweatpants on.

He had gotten a message from Karl asking whether or not he needs a ride to school, but nothing to check up on him. So far nobody has messaged him to see if he's alright or where he is, even though by now everyone likely knows about what happened at the party. George should've expected it, after all, as he only has surface level friendships. Still, it hurts and convinces him that he isn't good enough.

This brings George into old habits. He rummages through an old box under his bed and finds his bag of blades, practically running to the bathroom and locking it. George brings the blade down onto his wrists with force, creating a cut for each one of his imperfections.

It stings at first, but the pain subsides and turns to guilt. It's his fault that everything has happened, after all.

—————

Tuesday, George had gotten a message from Wilbur asking if he's alright, but doesn't bother to respond. His hands feel weak and he can hardly keep his eyes open. The brunette hasn't eaten since Friday, and his lack of energy surely shows that.

Pulling off his shirt, George looks at his body in the mirror. He's skin and bones, and his body is covered in bruises and cuts. His rib cage houses the bruises his father had left him, and his arms have the fresh cuts.

Regardless, he looks at his body and sees someone unworthy of love. Someone that will never be skinny enough or deserving of food.

To George, it's not Dream's fault. Dream didn't make him this way, but the heartbreak had prompted George to fall back into all of his old habits he had picked up after his mother's death. He feels guilty, wondering if people are worrying about him, but then remembers the fact that Wilbur is the only one to check up with him so far. George feels like shit, though, as he doesn't even have the decency to respond to Wilbur.

George ends the night by locking himself into his room, crying his eyes out as his arms sting with new cuts.

—————

On Wednesday, George is shocked to see a message from Sapnap asking where he's been. He doesn't respond, though, only watches the text bubble that shows that Sapnap is typing. He watches as the bubble appears and disappears, leaving George alone and disappointed. Of course Sapnap wouldn't actually want to check up on him.

George's mind has officially convinced him that nobody is there for him. He's convinced that he has nobody now besides his addiction to self harm. That's the only comfort he feels, the only thing to make him feel less alone.

By cutting himself, George can feel the pain he's caused others, and that makes him feel slightly better in a twisted way. He's continued depriving himself of food, feeling as if he's not worth the waste.

That night his father comes home drunk and takes his anger out on George, prompting the brunette to fall deeper into his depression. It's always been like this, only now the insults and hits sting and only cut deeper into his bruised heart. He's exhausted, far too exhausted to even try to fight back or stop him.