i miss you

Heading out

*Erika's POV

"Come on, let's go. The guys need to get on the road." It had been a couple days, and nothing with Ashton had changed. Kaitlyn continued to think I was going on tour with her and the guys, but there is no way. I've told her no every time, but she won't accept it.

"I'm not leaving him, Katy." I said, holding Ashton's hand and looking at him desperately. He is going to wake up. I know he will.

"Come on, Erika, you need to get out of here. Get away for a bit. If you stay here and watch him the entire time, you're just gonna make yourself depressed. Ashton will be okay. Besides, his fans would like to see you. Since you two have gone public, they've been blowing up the guys twitter."

I remembered back to the day we went public and a tear spilled out. Suddenly, I hated it all. All of it. I jumped out of the chair and yelled at Katy. "Do you understand they are the ones who put him here? Minutes after we posted it, he got shot. It's their fault! It's MY fault! I wanted to go public. I'm the reason Ashton got shot!"

"Erika, you know that's not true. Ashton wasn't the target. It was a robbery gone wrong. It's not their fault or your fault or anyone's, just please.. come with us. I'll worry about you the whole time if you don't come."

I paused for a second. I didn't believe any of it. A robbery gone wrong.. bullshit. But not matter what it really was, I refused to leave Ash until I knew he was okay. I needed him, our baby needed him.

"I can't. You go ahead. I'm just going to keep an eye on him."

"Erika-"

"If this were me in the bed, he wouldn't leave. I won't leave him, Kaitlyn."

"Hey, we need to get going." Calum popped his head in and I turned my attending to him, but Katy kept her eyes on me.

"Go Katy. I'll be okay."

"No." she bit out. I knew she wouldn't move until I changed my mind, but I'm not leaving.

"What's going on?" Cal asked, stepping into the room.

"Erika doesn't think she is going with us. Make her go Cal!" Katy yelled.

"You aren't going?" he asked me.

"No. I can't and you can't make me."

"Katy, give us a minute?" He said, looking directly at me. Katy didn't want to go but the look on my face made her turn around with a sigh and leave the room.

"There's nothing you can-"

"Will you call me every night? Tell me how he is doing? How you're doing?"

His questions took me completely off guard. "What?"

"The guys are worried about leaving him here like this. We don't want to leave and be told by some doctor over the phone that something has happened. We... just.. we are scared. Just like you. But we can't stay here. So just.. make sure he gets better. Don't let anything happen to him, Ryde."

I smiled with a sigh. It made me feel so much better that Cal wasn't going to fight me on this. "Thanks Calum. Nothing will happen except for him waking up, real soon." I grabbed Calum in a hug and he held on, not letting go.

"You take care of yourself too, kid. Don't want him waking up just to see that you're not well." With that, Cal kissed my head before heading out the door. As it opened, I heard Katy squeal just Calum's voice calmed her and all hell broke loose. She was throwing a fit, but I knew the guys were going to handle it so I ignored the noise and crawled onto the small bed with Ash, careful not to hurt him and cried myself to sleep on his chest.