Pain With Regrets *complete*

ch. twenty five

  FORTH'S P.O.V

"Tell  me  now pha before i loose my cool and start a fuse again "      i hissed on pha ...

"son first sit down and listen him na "     mom said as i still didn't sit down even tho we are already in thearter room ...

Beam is sleeping peacefully and as for sam he went to shopping alone ....He was excited to buy me t-shirts , why the hell i am that cruel ......

"ok .. fine now , now speak"    i said as i took a seat between mom and dad .. they both rubbed my both arms....

"hmm"   said pha and took a glass of water and gulp it down in one go ...

"i don't know forth from where to start but let's me start from the day you left  Thailand "

i nodded my head as that day is still as fresh as mint in my head ...

"that day you left was the day we  saw  him smile  for the last time. i am sorry to say  but  we all were mad on beam too so we left him too ... no talking to him , no caring for his food , never waited for him before classes , always tried to pick him up , make him guilty , bully him , and even knowing that he regrets this all but we still never looked at him with respect again .... it was like he became a .. err.. err a invisible to us .. i saw him change ..change so much but ignored it until one day me and kit got his call but instead of listening to him we both cured him and cut the call until we recevied a call from hospital that beam is hospitalized .... and when we...we find out that beam  tried to suicide ... the was unconscious   . and one thing which was a big shock to all of us when doctors told us  that he was raiped and  tried to  attempt suicide because he thought that he cheated on you ai'forth ..... after that incident we tried to not leave him alone but  for few days he distanced himself from us 'cause he can't digest the fact that he was touched somewhere where it was only your right .... but after a week he began to talk again but now being so stupid we thought that he's okay now so  we behaved like we used to and make him invisible again for us .......... but less we know he never being okay .. he always thinks that one day you will come back and will say you forgive him and will take him back again ......forth he just needed a push to understand his feelings and when you left he understood it but he was late .. too late that he find you again in his knifes , gas stove fire , beers and many more harmful things but he still made himself to live cause he thought that you will take him back but all he got was an invitation card of your marriage  ..."

* slap *    

i stood up again and slapped him and tried to slap kit to but ming saved him recevied it ...

"EVERY FUCKING DAY I FELT THAT HE IS IN SOME DIFFICULTY BUT WHENEVER I CALLED ANY OF YOU ALL YOU SAY THAT HE'S HAPPY ... HOW DARE YOU ALL LIE TO ME ... HE SUFFERED HELL BECAUSE OF ME ..I GOT MY PARENTS ,FRIENDS , SAM BESIDE ME IN THIS TOUGH SITUATION BUT YOU ALL LEFT ME ... SOMEONE IS ATTEMPTING SUICIDE , GETTING RAIPED , BULLY , BEATEN UP AND THIS WHAT YOU CALL BEING HAPPY "            again i was chocking but this time phana's neck ....

"me and beam may not be in this situtation if anyone of you have told me truth ... am i happy right now ??? no ... i am not...  it hurts more than being hated from him ... i ha...te ..y..ou ..*hick*  i hate you *hick* all ...."                    i cried telling them how i feel and tried to walk away ...

"where are you going forth "   i heard dad asking me where i am going ...

"to where that obviously to beam "

"and why ??"        he asked again  

"to tell him that its okay , that i forgave him , that i will never let him get hurt again and will always stay with him , "   i said and turned again to walk to my beam's room ..

but dad said something which made me stop .. maybe for forever ..

"and what will you say to sam ???"        he asked ..

sam the most pure soul i have ever seen  , the person who loved me at my worst 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Story is on perfect track right now but i never wished that forth will find out about beam this soon .

I am taking holidays...  I have a party to attend and pls pray for me that I don't encounter with that bitchy girl who ruined my bike or else I will end up in jail...

bye 

vote 

comment