Would you stay or leave me?

Chapter 19: Guilt

Finn's POV
(The day he was caught cheating)

After Jenna drove off, I quickly ran into the house and went to get my clothes to wear something before chasing after Jenna. But a hand tugged on me causing me to stop and turn to see Paige looking at me

"Please don't go. Your all I've got left" she said pleading me. The tears on her eyes threatening to come out.

I couldn't bear myself to let Jenna go, I can't believe myself. I didn't know how it felt to lose something so important until I really lost her.

"I'm sorry. But... I can't... I mean Paige.. look at us" I exclaimed " this is just so wrong"

She stood up and threaten to kill herself if I left the house. I put both hands on her shoulder and started shaking her

"Wake up Paige! Do you see what we've become? Both if us hurting the one person that's important to you and me. She did no wrong to both if us! We've made a big mistake." Exhaling and turn around " You know Paige, I thought I lost my feelings for her.... but actually... I still do love her, just that it was buried deep down." then I started walking out.

Driving around to towns and any possible place where Jenna would go. I even went to look at we favourite places,but still no sign of her.
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Paige's POV
Sitting there my back facing the wall with my blanket covering my whole body.

Pondering over what I've done, I feel very dirty. How can I do this to my own best friend.

I just couldn't help myself. Feeling guilt washing over me,knowing that I've lost someone so close to me. The only person that's known so much about my past,the person who's always there to support me.

Not realising I was crying until my vision got all blurry. I now know that what I've done is so wrong that it can't be mended. But I just couldn't help but feel jealous towards Jenna. How she has everything.

[Flashback]
Coming home to see my father with another woman on the bed. It's a usual thing for me,if this happens I would turn the other way around and quickly went into my room.

From my room I can hear them clearly, closing my ears to block the sounds out from my head. After their done, my dad would come in the room. Looking at me with hatred in his eyes,there's so much hate in his eyes that it could burn and shrivel you in pieces.

He would always say "Your such a whore just like your mother" I just ignored his comment. I really wanted to scream at him asking him to stop criticising my mother like that. He's the faggot,the womaniser, the asshole that ruined my life.

But I just hold it in,ignoring the pain inside of me. My mother promised that one day she'll take me away from this living hell. But it's been years, I don't know if I should still be waiting or should I just leave home and never look back.

If I choose to leave,he would track me down and he could do much worse. Only worse he can do now is beat me up when he's drunk.

But there was one day my world came crumbling down. The first thing was my mum had passed away and the other worst thing that I can never forget is, my own father raped me.

I remember it so vividly like it just happened yesterday. When I was in my room reading, my dad came into the room drunk. He started beating me and started to open his button. Pushing me to the bed and his hands on my wrists. I tried to struggling from his grip but there was no luck cause he was too strong for my tiny 13 year old body. I kept struggling but he wouldn't budge. Feeling something go inside of me,the pain that cause me to scream and tears started streaming down my cheeks. No one was there to help me.

No matter how hard I screamed and struggled I couldn't make him stop. After that he just left me on the bed, just lying there like a lifeless human on the bed. Tears slowly streaming down my eyes.

Everyday waking up to that haunting nightmare, my eyes getting puffy and red from crying in my sleep not being able to overcome it. It was one of those nightmares that will never go away.

Waking up from my daydream. I got up and wiped my tears away. Walking into the bathroom seeing my cheeks so puffy and my eyes red from crying. There are something that can't be changed,but I know what I can do now is try to help find Jenna and make amends with her. I now know that I can't lose my great friendship with her.

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A/N
Hey guys! Here's another update for you all. Anyways,I'll be having a exam soon. So hope you guys can understand. Man I hope I do well in the exam😭🔫

Anyways.....enjoy😘 lave ya all so much.