The last month - Karlnap

May 12-Date

Tw/Cw: Depression, Dyslexia, self-hate, mentions of suicide and suicidal thoughts

Karl POV:

I lay in bed, wait for something. I don't know what. Thoughts have been keeping me busy all day.

I just want Sapnap. I just want my boyfriend.

A message pop up on my phone:

'Sappyyy nappyyy ma boi ;)'

'Heyy! Wanna go out on a date with me? Now?'

My heart flatter. A small smile grow on my lips and I type fast in yes and send. I get up from the bed and get ready fast.

I run up to Sapnaps house and knock on the door. The door opens and behind stand a dark brown haired boy with a beautiful smile.

"Hi!" Sapnap say and give me a kiss.

"Hello!"

I push away all my thoughts and voices in my head and fill my head with Sapnap instead. Sapnap, Sapnap, Sapnap. I feel a little bit of happiness in my body.

"Let's go! I have some plans." He say again and pick up a bag. I don't know what's in it.

"Okay"

We start walking. None of us have a car so we have to walk. But I like it. Walk with Sapnap alone.

I carefully twirl in my finger in Sapnaps hand. We hold tight on to each other's hands. Lock them together so no one can open them.

We finally arrive to a big field with a lot of flowers next to a cliff. Beneath it a forest take place. On the field a big tree is placed. It is beautiful.

"I thought we could have picnic here..." Sapnap say and meet my eyes.

"I would love to!" I kiss him and we start pack up the picnic next to the tree.

I look around. The cliff is really high up. Should this be the place? The place were I jump for the last time?

Yes I think so.

"Hey leave your dreams and come and eat instead!"

My mood have brake down a little and I am not that happy as before but Sapnaps voice makes me always smile. I nod and we sit down next to the tree.

Sapnap has packed a lot of good things. Pancakes, cookies, tea and 'Monster'. I start eat and Sapnap too.

Even if the thoughts still fight with me I feel love from Sapnap and I don't think he hates me anymore. But my feelings change all the time and I don't know if I will feel the same tomorrow.

"It is great! Delicious." I say and look happily at my boyfriend.

He look at me and start laughing. A warm and nice laugh. I laugh to. I don't know what I am laughing at but it's fun.

"I see that, you have frosting on your nose!"

I blush and try to wipe it away. A little blue frosting stain form on my finger. I lick it up and giggle. Sapnap does too.

The rest of the date is going great. When we are done we pack the things and start go back home.

"Should we go home to me?" I ask and grab Sapnaps hand again.

"Sure! This time, do not run away from me so I have to trace you to your house and then you cry in the bed the rest of the night." He chuckle.

I blush and laugh a little bit. It was true tho. Sapnap have been in my house twice. First time he traced me the second day we met. Next time he traced me after I said I liked him to kiss me and be my boyfriend.

"No I won't!" I say after I laughed.

Finally I unlock my door and let Sapnap and me in. We decide to play some video games in the living room. We play some 'Mario kart' and 'Just dance'.

I love 'Just dance'. When I was a kid I used to go at ballet but then I got bullied for it and I stopped.

I looked at Sapnap. His strong body wasn't use to dance. It was not smooth moves. I have never seen anyone dance that bad before.

I can't help myself from laughing. I paused the game and turn to Sapnap.

"You are really bad at dance. I can teach you!" I say and turn on Spotify on my Alexa.

'Sweater weather' Came on and we start dance. I hold my hands around Sapnaps neck and my body close. Sapnap put his hands around my waist and we start rock slowly back and forth.

I stare deep in to Sapnaps eyes and lip sync to the song.

"Do you like this song?" Sapnap mumble and smile.

I just nod and give Sapnap a small kiss on his nose.

After some dancing we got to bed and cuddle before we fall asleep.

I really like Sapnap. I don't deserve him. I will never do.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
783 words

What did you think? A little longer chapter this time!

Vote?

Love you all ć;