Chances (changbin fanfic)

14

"I don't know what to do, her parents died and she didn't even tell me, and I didn't help her," I said to other members, with my face buried in my hands.

"It's not your fault, you didn't know," Seungmin said first.
"I think you should text her," Hyunjin said.
"Yeah call her Binnie," Chan added.

Others agreed with them, Felix was hugging me, even though I wasn't the one who needed a hug. She was. They all are really helpful, I don't know where I'd be without their help.

I felt bad for not caring even if she said she doesn't want to see me, I would never expect something like this could happen to her. My knees were weak in a matter of seconds when I saw the messages on the front door of the shop. I was checking almost every 2 days that if she opened it. But nothing. For a month and a half, I didn't even know what was happening to her. I fucked it up.
----

A month and a half already passed, my parents' funeral was big, every friend they ever had come, there were a lot of people, all of them offering me help. I was standing next to the coffins alone, everyone was just looking at me with a sorry look. I didn't want that, I didn't want anyone. I wanted to be alone. I wanted them to live.

Changbin only texted me that he understands my decision, he didn't try to contact me. I first thought that he just didn't care much, but maybe he wanted to be respectful.

I watched every single Kingdom performance they had. Everything was just so precise and calculated, their moves, choreography, voices. The only thing missing there was Hyunjin, I was confused at first but I found out that he's on some kind of a break.

I was happy to see him every week, even when he was on the other side of the screen, watching him without him knowing, he looked like he was having fun doing what he loves. He was the cutest when he couldn't even jump over that thing, being short, they were all laughing but I would just kiss him and tell him he's perfect at it. Also seeing him in pink sweatpants and sweatshirt, smiling all day and enjoying his friends make my heart ache a little bit less.

And of course. They won it all and they deserved it. They were for sure trying so hard to do it. I was so proud of them. Even if I saw them 2 times, I was proud of the boys I watched movies with and played card games with. I never felt so safe around 8 guys older than me. I would freak out if it was someone else but them? They make me feel like I belong somewhere.

It was Friday evening, I was laying on my bed, looking at the ceiling wondering where did it go wrong. How everyone I love left me, if they wanted to or not. They left. I cut off my friends too. I did that, I wanted to be alone, but there wasn't a single person I could hug tightly and cry to. I wanted to be hold and told that everything's gonna be alright.

I got a new notification on my phone, during one of my breakdowns, it was the first real notification after that month and half. From the person, I wanted to run from, but couldn't. Just the day after their win in Kingdom.

Changbin
I'm sorry if I'm interrupting you. Is there a possibility that I could see you? We need to talk.

I didn't hesitate a second and answered immediately.

can you come here?

Changbin
15 minutes

doors are open

I ran to the bathroom, putting some make-up on and covering the purple circles under my eyes, brushing my hair a little. I sat on the sofa, waiting for the boy who was the reason for my one lucky day.

After only 10 minutes I could hear a soft knock on the front door, he opened them and I could hear how he took off his shoes and how he was walking towards the living room. He was here once but I gave him a house tour so he knew where should go.

When I saw him my makeup didn't help, I started crying after I saw him standing at the door, looking at me.

He immediately sat down next to me and pushed me against his chest, I softly sobbed into his chest as he was caressing my hair.

"I'm here baby," he said quietly.

I started crying even more, I wasn't even able to breathe, his scent made me feel safe and so protected in his arms.

"I know about your parents, I saw the little messages on the door of the shop, just yesterday," he said still quiet, still holding me tightly.

"I-I'm s-sorry," I said between the sobs, that was all I could say out loud.

"No no, I'm here, you can cry," he said and put a small kiss on the top of my head.

We were sitting like that for half an hour in silence. I felt embarrassed to cry infront of him for this long, but I felt like I can, like he doesn't mind.

"Could you please stay with me tonight," I said quietly when I stopped crying.

"Of course," he said, hugging me even more tightly, "I'm going to change and bring some stuff for you, when did you eat?"

"Yesterday."

"I'm gonna run to the store to buy you something okay? We can order some food and watch a movie if it makes you feel better," he said putting small kisses on my forehead.

I wanted to go shopping with him, but I didn't want to stress him about it, I didn't want to risk someone seeing us.

"I'll be back in half an hour okay?" he said when he stood up, I could feel the cold feeling hitting through my whole body when I didn't feel his warmth anymore.

"Okay," I said quietly, he then disappeared from my house. I couldn't believe he would want to stay with me, after a month and a half of ignoring him. He is just too sweet for this world. So soft and kind. Too perfect for my broken soul.