when my lighter drops

L-OV-E

The drop in my stomach when she let me go. Why? Did I not do it for her? I thought we were both in L-OV-E. Why do I have to be wrong all the time?

The drop in my stomach when I let him go. Why? I wasn't what he needed; he was too good. I thought we were in L-OV-E. I was right. So was he.

I held myself tight enough to feel as though someone was there, like I had someone. To never see her again would pain me; haunt me to hell. She is my star. But I wasn't hers. I had to heal, take my mind and pain, empty it and give me a new star and help me find myself as a star. To love myself as much as I did her. I became empty to find her and she brought it back. Maybe it will happen again. Maybe I can get her back- no finding it and healing the break of me.

I ran trying to tell myself he wouldn't be alone, I could still love from afar. The pain and guilt ridden decision and after math. He's my moon so much more important than any little star. To love him was the most incredible. It was so much to see him so happy and content. Maybe I left him and he can still be his best lovely self. I didn't want to hurt him. But I couldn't hurt myself even though I did to both of us. I hope for him to heal and get rid of me from anything. For him to be so joyful.

After all, they match each other. They did not see again, did not feel again or the same. they tried to heal and mostly did. But then that brings them to the very moment of right now. How they look at each other and the unspoken love was known and became found, connected together. The 'healing' just hid away the only real feelings that go buried underneath it....