Passing a Note

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What do you do the day before you die?

What do you do when you know every atom around you could perish by this time tomorrow? What do you say? Where do you go? What do you eat? What do you do?

All Athena could do was sit in some random hotel off a highway in Missouri, fiddling with a broken lightsaber, examining her dead mother's holocron, or stress eating.

Not a single demon of Abeloth came for them that morning.

Or afternoon.

Or evening.

The 31st of December 2015 was quiet, yet anything but peaceful.

She couldn't trust a single ounce of that facade of safety. Every click. Every creek. Every unexpected breeze made the girl jump. By the end of the day, a pile of dead flies lied on the floor - Athena slicing the air with her mother's green blade every time an unfortunate bug buzzed too close.

In her eyes, anything and everything could be a threat. A minion of Abeloth.

That blip of her true form was so close to killing her on that road. How was she supposed to fight that? How was she supposed to keep that thing in its prison?

And what was she supposed to say to her friends? Her family?

How could she say 'I love you' when she knew she was anything but loveable. She was a monster made to kill another monster. She was but a threat to them all - whether or not they accepted to see that truth was not up to her.

She didn't even call Ahsoka, or the rest of the Ghost, that day. She didn't know what to tell them.

It hurt. It simply hurt.

It was a slow, agonizingly groggy day. It could not go by fast enough.

She never wanted to fight Abeloth, but the wait made it all the worse. Every moment that passed meant a moment closer to getting this over with - but it also meant she was ever so much closer to her doom.

What if the universe does get destroyed? What if she failed this just like she has failed everything else?

Her friends, her family, would die.

She wasn't exactly ready to die. She felt like it, oftentimes fantasized about it, but she wasn't truly ready to face it.

Had she even lived a life worth living just yet?

She'd gotten a family, but she disappointed them at just about every turn. She never said to their faces that she loved them. Only once did she mention it to Hera that she loved these people.

It was hard to speak. Every word that came out of her mouth always felt like a lie. It was hard to know any different.

She locked herself away - this time literally. By the time the sun set on the city of St. Louis, Missouri, Athena Jarrus spent some of her final few hours on Earth locked in a hotel bathroom. She curled up in the dry bathtub and shakily held the pen and paper in hand.

Ezra's uneasy eyes looked at Kanan as he sat next to him on the edge of the hotel bed. "It's getting late."

"She'll be out." Kanan softly spoke.

The clock kept ticking. And ticking. And ticking.

Kanan gulped as he looked at the clock on the wall. They were less than an hour away from the New Year. From the fight.

Athena stepped out of the bathroom door, bookbag slung on her right shoulder, and looked to her family.

She wore a black high neck shirt with no sleeves, nearly no back, and a hole right above her heart on the front. Her grey pants had diamonds cut out along the sides of her leg. Her blood red boots matched her long gloves and straps of material along her upper arms. Her blonde hair in a low ponytail.

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