You and me -always find a way back to eachother

he is fine without me

"sh shh you are gonna be okay, iam here" he said holding Alec hand. He stood up wiping his tears and picked his phone from night stand and walked towards window and went to recent call list and pressed green symbol "hello Raph grab everything you can and come to my home fast, I think Alec stitches are opened"

"slow down Mags, what do you mean opened, has something happened? call an ambulance" Raph said on the phone.

"I can't call ambulance okay, I I….he has marks…..hickies, scratches on his upper body, I tried to force myself on him, please come fast his crying and iam drunk, i can't do anything" he sniffled, looking at Alec.

"you did WHAT! Mags what the hell, he can't move from his bed and you tried to take a chance of that and now hurted him" Raph scolded.

"I tell everything when you come here, he tried to stand up when I was in living room and I didn't know anything about that, I don't know how much blood he lost. please come fast, infection can spread fast" he begged, sure this is all his fault, if he doesn't leave Alec alone in room, Alec doesn't try to stand up.

"you better have a good explanation, iam coming" with that call hung up.

Alec looked up saw tears falling from brown eyes and he wiped that "don't c-cry, it's not you y-your fault"

Magnus held Alec in his arms so tightly placing Alec head on his chest, afraid of everything and his instincts telling everything bad "iam sorry, i I should seen that before, you should have told me about that and iam sorry forcing myself to you, I never forgive myself for this and I never try to touch you again without your permission"

"GOD!..." he cried holding Magnus' arm tightly which was wrapped around him, he dug his nails "I forgave you, just don't drink this much, I love you Magnus Bane and trust me you are the only one, ahhhhhhh….mag ahhh…. Magnus?"

He looked at his legs and cried "please stop this, stop this pain, stop…."

Magnus doesn't know what to do other than holding him in his arms and comforting him, he wished Raphael would come fast as soon as possible.

"Why is he not moving" Raph asked as soon as he entered the room. Magnus looked up and saw Raph and Rachel stood at the door "please help me, please…." he asked.

Raph moved quickly and put his bag on the desk, picking everything from it, he put gloves first. Rachel came near and checked Alec's pulse and everything "his pulse is normal, I think he is unconscious" she said.

"I gave him sedative, pain is more and he cried, I couldn't see him like that and he asked me to….." Magnus words cutoff when Raph shouted "get the hell out of room Mags, you have done enough, clearly…"

He put Alec properly on bed and made his way to the living room. He sat on sofa and cried loudly thinking of how it all happened quickly, he made the biggest mistake and now he can't see those hazel eyes without feeling guilty.

He saw Raph running into Alec's room and picking stands to put Celine and medicine extra. after almost an hour, Rach and Raph came out. "he is okay for now but we decided to take him to hospital" she said calmly.

"you don't have to talk to him nicely, Rach. I will come tomorrow morning to take him to the hospital, you done enough. you have to see his face this afternoon, he only talked about you and asked about you. I spent hours telling about our college memories to him. What are you doing Magnus, I felt so proud looking at you, how you took care of him, how you handled situation but now I can only see a stupid friend who ruined everything himself" Raph said and walked away.

Rach came near to him and put her hand on his shoulder "everything will be okay, I know you guys love eachother so much but you very well know our protocol, patient and duty comes first other than anyone, he is in the same condition now where he was ten days before…. I will see you in the morning" she said and left.

He sat there for hours thinking about everything he did and his mind feeling dizzy because of alcohol, he stood up and went to see Alec. He looked at angel who looked like sleeping peacefully, he hesitated to move further, near to bed that he might be gonna hurt Alec, his presence in Alec's life felt so wrong.

He realised Damon's words were correct when they fought at hospital days before. "I shouldn't have kissed you forcefully in the first place, you will be fine without me, my presence only makes you suffer" with that thought he left the room and went to Alec's room and laid on bed, hugged the pillow.

He cried looking around, this room has so many memories, memories of him and Alec, how he teased Alec when he came first to this room, their kisses filled with this room, how they spend a night when his father came and forced them to sleep in same room, how Alec always ran to hide himself in this room so he can escape from Magnus tease and frustrating pleasure kissing games at starting. How every night he held Alec in his arms when Alec had attacks. there laughs, there hugs after Alec came from summer holidays spending with his family, how they shared food, how he stroked Alec's hair when they watched television.

How he built his future with Alec and now everything shattered. Tomorrow morning everything gonna change 'He is fine without me'