You and me -always find a way back to eachother

my guardian

"Magn.....ha!" he couldn't not finish his word as he looked down his hand which he raised to call Magnus, blood dropping from injection drip.

Magnus ran quickly removed it and pressed cotton ball to stop bleeding, he put bandage plaster on it and he searched for another nerve to place new saline intravenous.

Alec looked his love who doing something with hand, he closed his eyes and felt his dry throat hurting so much and his breathing became hard, he took deep breaths.

"was it necessary to fight in this position" Magnus asked placing Alec hand on stomach and adjusted volume rate of saline drip.

He sat on chair and ran his hand through raven hair, started massage scalp.

"if I have to, I will fight from my grave for you" Alec said relaxing himself in that touch try to move his head so Magnus hands can ran allover.

Magnus stopped massaging scalp "just look at yourself now. I need a break from us" he asked.

Alec eyes snap opened and horrified with that statement, his whole world and hopes he build these days crashed down, now he felt his whole body pain ten times increased and he can't able to breath.

He closed his eyes and took deep breath and tried to process what he listened.

"please don't break up with me. I admit I felt jealous and scared and done stupid thing but you promised you love me forever whatever happens" he asked.

Magnus quickly removed his hand "what! stop overthinking about everything. I want break from our relationship not from you. I don't want live like this Alec. I don't want live in fear that one day iam gonna loose you"

"iam going to be fine" he said trying to convince Magnus.

"It take months....i have to take care of you everyday and after that I have to scare when iam not around you that something gonna happen to you and I have to pray God everyday that make sure you come home safely. I don't want live like that" Magnus said wiping tear that dropping from hazel eyes.

"I I understand" Alec whispered closing his eyes, he knew his health issue is always his drawback but now it is reason to break his heart.

"do you promise, you will listen as I say and go to psychiatric after your recovery. i will help you, please do that from me, I want to start our life as soon as possible but not until you destroy demon inside you" Magnus asked caressing Alec cheek.

Alec opened his eyes, for seconds he looked into brown eyes without blinking and a new hope and happiness spread in his heart "do you think I can do that, can I overcome it. I promise I do anything as long as you stand beside me and hold my hand"

Magnus smiled "I love you Alexander Lightwood and now you are promised so no going back, I will make sure everything going to be fine" he placed quick kiss on Alec lips.

Alec quickly lifted his head to catch those lips but he failed and made disappointment sound.

"what" Magnus asked, he smiled.

"Magnus!" he called.

"you are not talking about what I did, you are saying everything except that, are you angry at me" he asked.

Magnus quickly stood up "I think you talked too much, you need to rest".

"talk to me please" Alec asked.

"this is not correct time to talk about that. I don't want to give you more pain, lets talk about that some other time" Magnus said and walked out.

He saw Alec friends standing outside "don't make him talk, he doesn't have energy has he thinks. Just go and see".

they nodded and stepped into room.

He walked towards reception, Rachel saw and came near to him "so how it went" she asked, he smiled weakly.

"you both are stubborn, he doesn't caring about his health and you also. you still have chance think once" she looked concern.

"what do I do, you have seen him, how his talking. Normal people who went though like this...feels pain, miserable, can't even talk" he said sitting on chair at waiting area.

"I know... but good thing is he still has energy" she said sitting beside him.

"how much....he can't even move from where he laid" he asked looking at her and tear started to form in his eyes. He controlled himself not to show his weak side to Alec.

"then why are you trying to take him home, let him be here, we all can take good care of him, he will recover fast" she asked.

"that's the problem if he stay here, he will get more angry looking at you and his friend trying so hard to take him. and more importantly the reason why I want to take care of him alone, he has to see what he gotten himself, how much iam suffering" he said thinking deeply.

she looked confusly "what! why do you want that!".

"this is how I want to give treatment to him, treat his panic attacks. I convinced him to go to therapy sessions after recovery but that's not gonna help, he done that before. He has to be the one pull himself out. he has to feel fear that if anything happens like this again, how it effect me, how I suffer. If he can almost pick a fight with you after been though all of this, think about how much he will become strong to overcome his attacks when he see what he done to me" he said staring at big wall.

"his lucky to have you" she smiled and tapped his hand.

"that apply both side" he smiled and continued "but I want to say sorry to you for how he behaved".

"it's okay Magnus. Iam happy you both are okay" she said and stood up.

"yeah for now, consequences of what he did are still balance until he recover" he mumbled.

"what" she asked looking at him, he shook his head and said nothing, they both went to cafeteria for coffee.