You and me -always find a way back to eachother

Nightmare

Magnus moved in sleep when he listened to muffle sounds, he opened his eyes and closed it and again opened it. He saw Alec's body shaking under him, he quickly looked up "Alec, Alexander…."

"pp-please…. please…"
"I I d-do...it….iam"
"try-trying ma...ma..." he listened.

"Hey hey Alexander" he tapped Alec's cheek.

"don't leave me"
"Iam be-beg-ging " Alec's body shaking violently and tears dropping, his whole body soaked with sweat.

"Alec is just a dream, wake up" he tapped cheeks again "follow my voice Alexander, please. It's me Magnus"

Alec's eyes snapped open and hugged Magnus tightly "he….I…. Mag…. scare…...I…. don't….. please"

Magnus tightly wrapped his arms around Alec who crying loudly "Alec shhh it's okay, i'm right here. Iam not let happen anything"

"nah... you... say….I iam….." Magnus cutoff Alec words "shhh okay, we will talk in the morning. Sleep, iam right here, sleep peacefully".

After minutes Alec again drifted into sleep and Magnus picked him in his arms and walked towards his room. He tucked the bed sheet on Alec and he laid on his side. he saw at the wall clock, it's three thirty in the morning, he couldn't sleep any further.

He slowly brushed Alec's hair that was falling on forehead and stared at the angel 's face. After the accident,  Alec never got one panic attack 'then why suddenly now' he thought.

~~~~~

He wanted to wake up his boyfriend, it's already eight forty in the morning, but he didn't.

Instead of that he sat there at the edge of bed looking at Alec. how can he do that, Alec's face looked so peaceful and calm like a baby.

He saw Alec moved in sleep and slowly opened his eyes started to adjust them to sunlight coming from the window.
"Ma-Magnus" Alec quickly sat up and wrapped his arms around his boyfriend "Iam sorry, please don't leave me".

"What! Iam right here and not going anywhere. What happened" he asked, soothing Alec back.

"y-you... you…. no-nothing" Alec mumbled.

"what happened, you are okay past days but last night something triggered your attack, talk to me" he asked, pushing Alec shoulders to see his face, but Alec winced and wrapped his arms more tightly around Magnus and hid his face on neck.

"just don't go anywhere. sit with me, I want you. right beside me" Alec whispered.

"we have to get ready, we have to complete your daily routines and after that you have an online class to attend" he said running his hands on Alec's messy hair and gently held Alec to see his face

Alec removed his hands around him "now tell me, what triggered" Magnus asked placing his hand on Alec's cheek.

"where is my ring" Alec panicked looking down at his hand "I asked you where my god damn ring, you took it, didn't you" his face looked so angry and yet tears threatened to fall from his eyes.

"what?" he asked confusedly.

"how can you do that to me, you don't have the right to take it back. I told you I will make it, I will act how you wanted" Alec started to sob.

"Alec listened to me, it fell on the ground. I didn't take it. I brought a loose one. It's safe I put that in the closet" he tried to assure him but Alec didn't seem to listen. He ran to the closet and came with that ring.

"Here see!" He showed it to Alec.

Alec quickly took it and put it in his finger.

"was it nightmare about me? what happened, you clearly taking me as target Alec. you don't have to be afraid. I don't hurt you. Please tell me about it" he asked, holding Alec's left hand in his both hands.

Alec stared at his ring and didn't give any answer to him.

"remember we promised each other, we can get through this, tell me about your nightmare" he asked again.

"Do you think it's possible, Iam nineteen Magnus, I lived my eleven years of life with this, do you think I can end this. miracles don't happen in real life" Alec whispered, his voice held so much pain and tears never stopped falling.

"you have me now, everything is possible, I will make it. My love for you, our love can make it" Magnus assured him.

"when will we going to have sex" Alec asked looking at his boyfriend.

"wh-what"he asked.

"you listened me, when you are going to have sex with me" Alec asked looking at brown eyes.

"it's not a good time Alec, we should talk about your nightmare" he said, he didn't know why this sudden question popup.

"Iam fine Magnus, we should do that now" he mumbled and started to unbutton Magnus's shirt.

"you are not fine,I already told you we start our life when you pass your fear" he said, holding Alec's hand.

"I don't know when or maybe I never overcome it and it doesn't matter anything to do with this. this is our life and iam fine,  I have a small injury below my knees, it didn't hurt me, we can do this" Alec started to kiss Magnus jawline then neck at the same time started to unbutton the shirt.

"Alec!!! please" he asked.

"you don't want me, I know it. even if I beg you, you don't do that. I have seen your eyes, how you are tired of being with me, how you want to get rid of me so eagerly. You left me…..come on please I don't want that happen please you should definitely have sex with me, just taste me" he begged removing last button of Magnus's shirt.

Magnus quickly held his wrists tightly, listening that he didn't know what he did in Alec's nightmare.

they had a couple of fights in real but never Alec feared like this and all because of one nightmare "iam not going to do that Alec, we are not doing that. and I promised you, I will spend my rest of life with you, you have to trust me"

"I trust you but you can't keep your promise in future. please, what is your problem with having sex. Am I not good enough for that. please" he asked and Magnus grip got tight around his wrists.

"you are hurting me" he said.

Magnus quickly released Alec's wrists, when he listened that.

Alec started to remove his t-shirt from above his head after getting rid of Magnus's shirt.

"Wait" Magnus said but he pushed Magnus' hands away from him and removed it.

"Maybe you don't need this, you've done it a hundred times. I never done this before, you don't feel like me and you are not ev..en……" Alec words cut off when Magnus pushed him to bed and gripped his wrists and pinned both hands above head.

"you don't have any clue, what I feel and how desperate Iam to have you. you clearly are not in the right mind Alec. you once stopped me doing the wrong thing and now you are trying to do it" he said looking into hazel eyes.

"I know what iam doing, OKAY. iam not drunk and iam not trying to force myself on you like you did" Alec shouted soon he regretted what he said.

Magnus quickly stood up and picked his shirt to wear.

Alec sat regretting himself why he made that statement, already Magnus suffering a lot by his own guilt and now his words "Iam sorry, I didn't mean to….."

Magnus cut Alec words "don't be, whatever you said was true. I tried to do that, what should I say... iam monster" he chuckled but his face clearly showing pain, he was broken by listening to that.

"I didn't……" again he cutoff Alec words "it's okay Alexander, apparently this monster can't win trust from you, so you can freely share your memory of the nightmare with me. Leave it, we should concentrate on your fresh up. Your class must start in one hour" with that he left to restroom.

They both didn't talk after that, Magnus kept himself silent when he gave a sponge bath and Alec's eyes became red, he didn't stop crying while eating his breakfast.