There's Fire

Figuring it Out

Roman's POV

We let ourselves in and we honestly didn't realize it until we sat downstairs where we said we'd meet. There were already plates, napkins, utensils, and drinks on the table. We looked over as Nick came downstairs holding a tray that held two big bowls. "We let ourselves in. Old habits die hard." My mom mumbled. We were all sitting around the table at my childhood home. Janae sat on my right side holding my hand and my mother was on my left in between Gianni and I. Bella was on the other side of him. Nick sat on the opposite side of the table. Bella fixed her plate and started eating. Our mom chuckled at her and she shrugged. "I'm still breast feeding and I'm constantly starving. He made the garlic and herb chicken and rice. He knows we usually eat lunch around now." Bella had a point. One thing we all had in common was when and how often we ate. My sibling and I were what our parents teased as bottomless pits. Now we all see that in our own kids. "I made it for us. We can eat and talk." He motioned to us. We all fixed plates. He smiled at us but look at him the past several month have not been kind. "This is your home, whether or not any of you live here anymore this will always be your home. Everything I have done, everything I ever did was for my family to keep you safe." He spoke humbly.

   "Well this table is a little empty, so obviously that didn't work." I motioned to the empty seats.

   "Roman." My mom squeezed my hand to reprimand me.

   "I've tried my hardest to protect you all. My children." He looked at each of us. "My wife." He gazed at my mother. "My children's spouses." He motioned to Janae.  "And their children. I tried my best to keep you all safe. I still try."

   "Tell that to our sons." We all looked at Gianni as he played with his wedding ring he had begun to wear again at some point last year. Bella had previously told me not to mention it, so I didn't. "Oh yeah mine died with my wife. Bobby would love to, oh never mind he went a week after his. Roman and Janae because of all of this had to cremate a second one while he was at deaths door himself. That brings Janae to a total of 2 dead Marchetti son's now if we're keeping track." He spat at our dad, but I saw Janae shrink out of the corner of my eye. It will always be a sore spot about Bobby and the baby that she was still trauma she was working through to this day. She just turned to me and laid her head in my neck. I just rubbed her back trying to comfort her. Gianni on the other hand, who normally noticed these things, was focused on our father right now. "Bella was the closest to a son, but dammit still so far." Bella set her fork down and I noticed Gianni carefully pull her into his side as he continued. "At least Angelo gets to hug, wait nope wrong again. I try not to cuss in front of Missy. Bella tries not to take Roman and my new hoodies. Roman tries not to get new tattoos. We don't try to protect our kids we do. There is a difference between who our parent is and how we choose to parent. I have so many guards on Zariah at any given moment of the day she could start her own mafia. Missy never leaves my sight and even if she does go alone with her mom she has her own army. Roman has teams for each kid, shit he tracked down relatives for Val's family in the Romanian mafia just to secure more than enough security for Tati. Don't get me started on Adrian and Eva. Violet, Rose, and Lily holy shit Bella's house is so armed and secure the rare occasion they do go out in public people could swear they're fucking world leaders and not infants! You tried and you fail. You don't just try to protect your kids in this line of work. We can't afford that. Trying is one of the few things we can't afford."

   "I did everything that I thought was best." Our dad remained sitting while speaking.

   "No, Roman tackling Adrian to the ground and taking an entire clip and some change for her is doing what's best." Gianni stood up letting go of Bella and started pacing. "You know how life was supposed to go. I'll tell you. You and mom fall in love you have a litter of us. We grow up, get married, have our own kids, we survive. Nick you die first cause you're older, the oldest and that's how life is supposed to work that way. The eventually mom is to follow. After that it would be me, then Bobby, the, Angelo, then Roman, and Bella would have been the last one standing because she's the baby. That is how it's supposed to work maybe one of our lives would end earlier than expected due to unexpected circumstances like illness or car accident, but not a hit! Not someone purposely killing us. You know what's funny, for a brief window of time last year when I had to pull out the suit I wore to my wife and my child's funeral, to my brother's funeral, and to my other brother's funeral so that I could wear it to my baby brother's funeral I realized the last two standing were the first and the last. The crazy thing was I knew next it wasn't going to me yet again. They already got me. They wouldn't do it again. They didn't just wound the heir. They got the victory of taking damn near completely out of the game. I mean shit we all know dad's pride and joy was his only princess. The both of us had been targeted before, but the one child that really forced dad's hand Bella more and in front of the underworld, when her house burned down. They wouldn't try until Roman was cold, but eventually it would have been her not me because that is sweet, sweet, icing on the cake revenge was me being gone is enough. The very first heir to step down and give up the title as capo in all of our families history is a cowered after his wife was killed and hid out from the world and everything, but the single princess is now a force to reckon with in this game. Bella you should see if Mariabella will talk to you because you do shit that she did and that has been seen in the game since she decided to unofficially join the undead. Shits beautiful. There are 6 of us in here. 5 of us have killed. 4 of us have had to make hard calls. 3 would have made the call to hit the part that makes them look weak. Kill the crown jewel." He paused long enough to kiss Bella's head. "In that realization I accepted if that would happen if Roman were to have died and Bella did. Mom surely would have killed herself. I'd have to kill you myself. It would have been easy. I mean with each loss I've experienced the idea of killing my own father became an easy decision to make. I know how I'd do it too. I know I'd be able to sleep afterward. I know in front of the public eye I could play the destroyed grief stricken son and smile later as they close that cold piece of marble over your body. Why is all of this so natural to me because I know Bella couldn't do it no matter how much she wanted to, she could not kill our father. Roman, give the right circumstance could do it, but in the end it would severely wound him to do it and he wouldn't be the same. Mom, I love you, but this man has been all you knew since you were a child. He himself would have had to personally kill one of us for you to kill him. Why could I do it and not bat an eye you guys ask, because I'm the heir. Roman and Bella, do you two really want to know what it was like for me growing up? You always thought I was the golden child. Dad's love and energy and pride came easy to me. I never worked for it. I exhaled and had all of his attention. Well all of that came with a price. Do you want to know why none of you were trained as kids like you were supposed to be? You're looking at the reason. With each kid born I was told you have to protect them because you're their big brother. It did not matter that Bobby and Angelo were practically my age they were my responsibility. Did you ever tell mom?" A smiled grew and Gianni's face and our father had his poker face on meaning he just stared at him. "You didn't. Mom did you know your husband in exchange of my sibling futures to do whatever they wanted free of punishment, free of banishment, and free of threat of disownment could live their lives as they pleased. I made this deal at 14. I signed a legally binding contract in my own blood with my own father at 14 to save my siblings to let them do whatever the hell they wanted. I always pushed them to do other things, but hey it's a family business right. I had no problem if they made the decision themselves. They wanted to do it that was my terms. He respected that and in exchanged he owned me. Why because I'm the heir. Everyone after me was the spare. Dad gave mom more kids after Bobby because she wanted a girl. He did that to make her happy, but as far as business goes he was good. The contract had everything down to who I married, I was supposed to have an arranged marriage, but he liked Dani so that was okay. Since I was the heir at 14 I signed away my children as well. Zariah should have been in training from 5, but you know my wife and child brutally murder puts a damper on those plans. Bobby, of his own free will stepped up unknowingly saving Zariah and I. After Bobby it was Tristan and now that low pissed dad off and the contact came back. As soon as Tristan stepped down though, man he slapped that paper on my chest so fast." He slammed his hand on the table. "He knew Angelo would never willingly step up. Roman was engaged by then and soon to be married and I saw him maybe one day taking the seat then dad suggested it. At any point Roman if you would have said no, I would have done it, but you didn't say no. The catch is you have to say no, you have to say the words no I do not want to be the don. Now while you were in a Coma Roman I found plenty of loopholes, but the pesky thing about being and heir is once and heir always the heir. Just as Zariah is the rightful heir above Adrian. Then for then whoever has the first grandkid after that. While you we busy grooming one child someone you pissed off was taking out the rest. We know Drew and Conner are behind Bobby and everything after him. You did something to someone that held that grudge and recruited them. Be a fucking dad for the first time and not just a father. Who is it dammit?" Gianni finished his tirade and we all looked at his father.