Once A Lost Girl | Once Upon A Time Story | Peter Pan

03x09 - True Colors - Past

        I didn't say anything all night. I just laid there in Peter's arms once he'd gotten me back to camp. I was exhausted, but I couldn't sleep. He held me just as gentle as any other time, but the comfort I was seeking was gone. It felt empty and cold no matter how many forehead kisses he gave me.

        Whatever I was seeking, we couldn't stay like that forever. Slowly, I separated myself from him, running a hand through my hair. Peter didn't let me get very far. I furrowed my brow at him, silently asking why he stopped me.

        "What happened last night?" he asked gently. I shook my head. He sighed. "Nothing? You fell apart in the middle of the Dark Jungle. What were you even doing there?" I bit the inside of my cheek to stay silent. "Elyssa."

        "Doesn't matter," I said, "I won't do it again." I got what I needed.

        "No, I'm sure you won't." Peter's tone shifted. I could hear that underlying apprehension. His face was blank, seemingly unfazed but also not angry. Peter was just... empty. Void.

        We just stared at each other for a while. Nothing behind his eyes and everything behind mine. A pit formed in my stomach again. The way he was looking at me was making me nervous. I stood, unable to take the staring anymore, grabbed my bag and headed out. He followed, calling behind me.

        "Leaving again? After that? After what you did?" He grabbed my arm. I swung around, jerking away from him. Does he know?

        "Can I--I just need a minute."

        "A minute to do what, Love? Run off to another part of the Dark Jungle to get killed?" Pan seethed. Lost Boys are watching now. A knot was forming in the back of my throat.

        "No rules here, right? Trust me, I'm not going back there since you're so concerned." I turned again.

        "So that's it, then?"

        I huffed, "That's it."

        "You're making a mistake, Elyssa. Walk out of this camp and you'll regret it."

        I paused. "No, Pan. I won't." I left. 

        Was he sad? Angry? Did he even care? Further than that, would this work? Does he know? The things he’s said and the way he’s been acting. Part of me knows the answer already; the other part of me hoped I was wrong. 

        I double and then triple checked my bag, rushing to the place Bae and I were supposed to meet. I was already late. I considered dropping a few tree branches, but honestly that might draw more attention to me. Just trust. Just believe. It’s Neverland. That’s what the boys were telling me the other night. All I have to do is believe. It’ll work out. It has to. 

        Baelfire was already at the meeting spot when I arrived. He was near frantic. I shushed him, telling him there wasn't time. We just had to move. 

        "Lys! Wait a minute!" He called. 

        "Bae, we don't have a minute. We have no time."

        "Then at least tell me what happened while we're moving."

        I swallowed. "I think he knows."

        "That we're trying to escape?" Baelfire said, "he's known I've been trying to leave."

        "No, Bae. He knows I'm helping you. He knows I went to Dark Hollow. Pan knows I betrayed him and if we don't follow the plan we're toast--I'm toast." I pulled him through the forest. "And I haven't been completely honest with you either." Baelfire didn't say anything. I took his silence as an offer to elaborate. "I need to go back to the Enchanted Forest."