Once A Lost Girl | Once Upon A Time Story | Peter Pan

03x10 - What Do You Live For? - Present

        The trek back to Granny's was silent. I wonder how he'll do it. It won't be messy. Probably a spell of some kind. Maybe he'll simply snap us out of existence. It would be painless, however, and that isn't his style. We'd feel it somehow.

        A scream jolted me out of my thoughts. I jumped and darted in that direction. The scream sounded again, and I picked up the pace. It was Mother Superior. She ran up the stairs as fast as she could. I looked around. What the hell was she running from?

        An all too familiar gray blur zoomed passed. My heart sank. The shadow. It flew to her and tore her shadow from her body. She collapsed. I gasped and stopped mid-stride. David, Emma, Hook, Tink, and Mary Margaret looked on in horror. I approached slowly. Neal wasn't far behind.

        "She's gone," David said softly.

        "What the hell happened?" Regina approached with Henry. David covered the body.

        "The shadow. It killed her." David stood up straight. I stared down at the sheet.

        "Pan's shadow? I trapped it in the sail."

        "Yeah, well, it got free," Emma remarked.

        Neal cut in before Regina could get snarky. "Look, let's go back to the ship and get the candle. If it strikes again, we need to be able to capture it." Tink, Hook, and Neal left headed for the Jolly Roger.

        Pan looked at me, eyes boring into my soul. Even wearing my brother's skin, he could never fool me. Though, it isn't like he wanted to fool me. No, he wants me to know its him. I'm the only one who knows, and they won't trust me. I try to rat him out right now, and he'll just cry and blame me. Regina will jump at the chance.

        So I do the one thing he can't stand; I walk away. Snow reached for me and I dodged her. No clue when he'll strike, but if the Shadow is moving it will be soon. He can't risk too much time like this. At some point, someone will catch on besides me.

And I'll be a target.

        I turned. Red will keep my stuff safe until I can collect it and pretend I'll wake up tomorrow. Instead of Granny's, I booked it to Gold's. I needed to get there before Team True Love decided to get that bright idea next. He would be stupid not to come after me. Stupid or hubristic, I haven't decided. Either way, I've proven myself less predictable than he thought.

        "Gold," I called, "we need to talk."

        He walked to the front room, brows furrowed. "And what could this possibly be about? I can't make Henry love you again if that's what you're here for."

        "This is about Pan." I stared him down. "His shadow. It's out of the sail. I'm sure Emma and the Love Brigade are on their way here to tell you all about it."

        The tiniest bit of amusement lit up in his eyes. "And you aren't?" I stayed silent. "Alright, Princess, I'll bite. What possibly could you need from me?"

        "Beyond the... enlightening information I learned... there's always been something that's bugged me about this whole situation." I stared into one of the glass cases, not quite focusing on the antiques. My eyes stared back at me almost in judgement. "I'm missing time. And not from the curse. I remember taking that vial from you, and I remember the Shadow flying me back to Neverland. After that... I'm not sure. There's... just nothing until I'm back in the Enchanted Forest, washed up on the bank of a fishing town."

        Rumpelstiltskin scanned me. "I wondered what he wanted it for. I assumed to deter me." He reached down and pulled out a box, setting it on the counter. "What he did to you, there's nothing I have that can mend it. But I can give you the time back." He pulled a matching vial from the box. "It was a memory poison. In the spirit of... giving... and for the sake of Henry... take it. Free of charge."

        "What's the catch?" I narrowed my eyes and scanned his face.

        "No catch. Though, if you recall, we made a deal all those years ago." He shut the box. "I need to cash in. Pan clearly will not stop until he gets what he wants."

        "And what does he want?"

        "To live forever, and to make us suffer for it." Gold adjusted his cufflinks. "It's what I would do. And he needs you alive to get what he wants."

        I huffed. "Why? Because both of you believe in that 'magic of both dark and light' shit that got both of you to manipulate me in the first place? He never did anything with that anyway." Gold just stared at me. My stomach twisted. "Gold..."

         "I need you and my shadow to hide away with the Dark One dagger."

         I frowned. Hide away? What else is he not saying? "Gold--"

        "Do this. Your debt is paid. Henry lives."

        "What are you talking about?"

        "Elyssa?" Emma walked into Gold's shop.

        "Well?" Gold asked.

        "Fine," I sighed. I turned and brushed passed Emma. She stopped me. Her parents were behind her.

        "Hey, wait, we need to talk."

        "No." I walked out.

~~

        I took a breath, going to the one place I could think of: the toll bridge. I sat in the same place I fell asleep. It wasn't too long before Rumple's shadow made itself known to me. It wooshed by before pausing and looking at me. I just stared up and sighed. 

        The Shadow seemed agitated. Clearly, something was up, but I have no idea what. I stayed put, however. After a while, I regretted agreeing to. Maybe sitting in Nigel's apartment would be better. There'd be a heater at least. After a while, I groaned. "This is ridiculous." I stood. The shadow blocked my path. "Relax! I'm not running back into town if that's what you're worried about."

        It backed off but not without a nice glare. I rolled my eyes. Seriously? Is there a shadow that doesn't have an attitude?

        "Do you know why I have to be here?" I looked at the shadow. It didn't offer a reaction. "Come on. Not even a hint?" Nothing. I huffed. "Fine. If I can supposedly wield both light and dark magic, why the hell am I so bad at both, hm? I can barely freeze someone in place." The shadow just looked at me. Specifically, it looked at my pocket. I clutched the bottle. "What if it's better that I don't know?" Rumple's shadow actually shook it's head then.

        I popped the cork out of the bottle. A memory potion could bring it all back. Every muddled detail could come into focus. The question now is do I drink it? Do I let myself remember? Gold seems like he doesn't want to tell me the whole story himself, and it isn't like I'll be around much longer to think about it. This is probably the only way I'll know. 

You don't want to know. I do. Do you? 

Fuck. 

I knock it back in one swift motion.