It's not just you - Phan (completed)

Healthy

Dan spent every inch of his existence to get me back to full health. He spent his mornings creating meal plans for the day, making sure that they would give me enough nutrients and calories so I could get healthy quickly. There was even a week that he'd make me put swimming trunks on after filling the bath to exactly 42°c and sit in the tub as he washed my hair and body. It was nice, very nice.

It had been exactly a month, and a few days ago I told Dan he could stop looking after me and start focusing on himself again. I didn't want to be babied much longer, I felt myself going crazy. However I already missed the closeness of us and I was worried that I wouldn't get better.

That is until I heard Dan one night mumbling to himself.

I remember exactly; it was quarter past midnight and neither of us were tired, but had retired to our rooms for the rest of the night. I was changing into pyjamas, and getting ready to hop into bed and check my social media sights. That's when Dan started mumbling. At first, I didn't think anything of it as he always mumbles and I have gotten used to it, but then he started saying things I hadn't heard since 2012.

"Why do I even bother, I'm so useless and insignificant. Phil doesn't want me clinging to him, that's why he asked me to leave. What if he meant leave fully? Leave the flat?"

I left my room, not even bothering to knock on Dan's door before storming in, the younger barely able to get out my name as I tackled him into a hug, hiding my head in Dan's shoulder and squeezing him. "What are you doing?" Dan frowned, hugging my back gingerly.

"Just shut up." I muttered, squeezing him tighter. Dan chuckled slightly, hugging me back with as much enthusiasm as I had. We stood there for a minute or so, before I pulled back, but only enough so I could look at him.

"What brought this on?" Dan asked, tilting his head. I shrugged, too focused on making sure he couldn't tell I was internally freaking out about my sudden urge to kiss him.

"Please don't put yourself down. I hate to see you like that, it reminds me of when you were bad in 2012." Dan sighed, staring at me as he straightened his head to fall inline with the rest of his body.

"You heard I see."

"You're louder than you think Dan."

There was silence in the room then, and all I could seem to hear was the overwhelming drum of my heart against my chest as I looked at him. He was so beautiful and I loved it. Dan seemed to smile slightly, lifting a hand and running it slowly through my hair, myself unintentionally leaning into the touch.

I love you.

"Say it." Dan whispered, his hands gripping at my hair as I frowned. "Say what you said the last day of Vidcon."

"We weren't there for the last day of Vidcon because I said that I lo-" It hit me what he meant and my heart started beating like a hummingbirds wings. Why did he want me to say I loved him?

"Say it."

"No."

"Please."

"No, Dan I-"

"Phil, please say it!" Dan yelled and I flinched, closing my eyes. There was a long pause before I sighed, keeping my eyes closed as I told him what he wanted.

"I love you."

Then he kissed me.

It wasn't how we used to kiss; sloppy and needy and lustful. This was romantic. He kissed me like he meant it, closed mouthed at first as he just pressed his lips against mine, before I got the message. My hands moved to his neck, holding there as I was afraid my legs would give way at any second, but they didn't. There was so much electricity, so much emotion and so much pain that my body functioned, and it felt like my heart was exploding and rebuilding itself over and over again as his thumb drew circles on my cheek whilst the other hand held my waist. The kiss was so slow and I'd never experienced such an overwhelming feeling of love ever before.

Eventually we both pulled back, slightly breathless as we clunked foreheads and let ourselves relax slightly.

"I should've done that when you told me back at Vidcon. Then none of the stuff in between would've happened and I could've confessed in that bathroom." Dan muttered out, thumb stilling on my cheek. I sighed, shaking my head.

"I'm glad it happened like this. It made me realise how much I've missed you." I smiled, pecking Dan's lips before returning to my position. Only now did I notice how we were stood centre of Dan's room.

"I love you Phil."

"I love you too."

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This took so long I know I'm sorry.
BUT I only have 24/23 days left at school and I'm freaking out because GCSEs ARE A BIG DEAL YO.

I'll try and post but I can't promise anything.

Also, I think the next chapter is the ending on this Phan *cries* although that means I can FINALLY start my troyler *cheers*

Te amo,
Mitzu
Xx