Break The Cycle (BWay Yungy)

24🥀: Forgiveness

ONE MONTH LATER:

|Janika Starr 🌟|:
Today's finally the day I'm getting released out this bitch. It's been a long ass journey and I still gotta come in for weekly sessions with my therapist, but I can honestly say that I'm in a good place now.

"Niks I'ma miss the hell out of you." my crazy ass roommate who just moved in squeals, wrapping her arms around my neck. I force a smile and awkwardly hug her back. She cool and whatever but she got locked up in here for stabbing her momma in her face at the back of a church so I kinda worry when I'm around her. I gave her my number just to be nice, though I doubt she getting out this place anytime soon. They fucking retarded if they let her ass out.

I walk into the bathroom and drop my small bag full of clothes on the floor by the sink. I run the water some and splash some water on my face. I then take a look at myself in the mirror. I'm dressed in some jeans and a black crop top, and my hair is done in some dark braids. My amber brown eyes look greenish in this light. Back then all the trauma I experienced and hid deep inside always caused my eyes to be all fogged up and clouded, but now there's a sharper and clearer look to it now, as if I'm finally in balance with myself.

"This was a waste of time." My head snaps up to see Santana in the mirror standing right behind me, wearing exactly what I'm wearing. Now that I think about it, I seem more and more like her these days, even my thoughts and demeanor been switching up.

"What you want?" I try to ask nonchalantly. I won't even bother looking behind me because I know I won't see shit.

"Just seeing for myself what they did to you. You look better, I'll give you that. In fact, you look a lot more like me. Finally starting to accept who you are?"

I smile a bit. "I'm Janika. I don't give a fuck anymore about whatever you made me do in the past, I'm past it and I forgive you."

She blinks, her eyes getting a bit wide. This is the first time I've really seen her fumble her composure like this. "You-what? You forgive me?"

I sigh, trying to remember what my therapist taught me. "Whatever you did, you did to protect me. I wish you hadn't done a lot of what you did but it is what it is. No changing it now. So let's just decide to work together from now on and avoid future problems."

She staring at me with slightly wide eyes but I'm not phased. I really learned how to get in touch with my emotions so I already know what this bitch is about. I made her out to be the heartless opp for so long that like all other emotions, she got used to it and started giving out what I was bringing in. That's primarily my fault so I ain't bothered.

Her hand suddenly lands solidly on my shoulder like she's real and I twist around quickly, a shriek rising up in my throat, but there's no one in the bathroom with me. "What the fuck?" I mumble, feeling the phantom feeling of her hand on my shoulder. This bitch too fucking weird, but we'll work through it I guess.

I make my way out the bathroom and out the lobby, nodding with a small smile at the receptionist before making my way out of the fucking nut house. I stop at the top of the stairs and take a moment to breathe in the fresh air. Damn, I missed the outside world.

"Is that my lil gangsta, Janika?" I look towards the voice and smile as I come down the steps, seeing Lay of all people leaning against her car, with sunglasses on her face for some reason.

"Wassup." I hug her when I reach her. Me and Lay talked a couple of times while I was checked in but I mostly ignored her like everyone else so that I could focus on getting better.

"Damn girl, look at you." She inspects me head to toe at arm's length. "You look kinda darker but it suits you. You got sexier, too. Your skin look brighter and your ass got bigger. They be feeding y'all good in there or something?"