The Affair

47. Apologies

You can run from your problems but just know that they, in turn, are chasing you and it's only a matter of time before you get tired and they catch up with you.

'Good evening Mr. Ogbonna.'

'Good evening Dr. Audu.'

Kosi stood awkwardly at Dr. Audu's door. The last time he saw the Doctor was at the hospital before Eva was discharged and Ebuka was trying to steal Eva away from him. He recounted the last conversation he had with the Doctor and shook his head.

'Can I come in?'

The way Doctor Audu stared at Kosi made him feel like he was in a hospital getting a check up. He combed his hair with his hand and averted his gaze. Doctor Audu seemed to understand how Kosi felt and quickly replied.

'I'm sorry. Come in.'

Then he opened the door wider for Kosi to enter.

Kosi slowly walked into Doctor Audu's home not knowing what to expect. It seemed very cozy. The house was painted a dull yellow and the furniture was a mixture of various shades of brown. Family pictures littered the walls. Wedding pictures of Doctor Audu and his wife, a picture of a little boy on the shoulders of Doctor Audu by the beach, another of a teenager donning a graduation gown with a backdrop of Cambridge University sign.

'My wife died in a car accident five years ago.'

Kosi immediately turned to face Doctor Audu. There was a wry smile on his face as he looked at him.

'I'm so sorry. I... I never knew.' Kosi replied apologetically. He immediately remembered how he had screamed at Doctor Audu in Chapter 26 when he assumed he didn't understand the pain he felt. 'If I had known...' 

Doctor Audu waved him off. 'There's nothing that you could have done and there's no way you could have known.' He said walking closer to Kosi. 'Losing my wife was one of the most difficult things I have ever experienced in my life.' He continued. His eyes drifted to his wedding picture hanging on the wall. 'Medical school exposes you to so many things; accidents, loss, pain, humanity, death. But all those things it exposes you to, are for someone else. You become numb to certain sights and feelings when you see them in others but not the ones you feel for yourself or your own family or someone you love dearly.'

Kosi just stood there, unable to say anything.

'My wife... the day before her accident we had a huge fight, she wanted more children but I thought having Ben was enough. I couldn't take care of another child with my crazy schedule but she really wanted a girl.'

Doctor Audu paused and bent head slightly. Kosi waited patiently as he watched him wipe his eyes.

'She screamed and I screamed and she slept in the guest house that night.' He let out a deep sigh filled with regret and pain. 'The next day, I went to the guest house to make up with her but she left a note on the door saying she had gone to get lemon cake.' He laughed suddenly.

'Whenever we want to apologise after a fight we get cake.' He explained. 'Lemon cake for me because it's my favourite and for her butterscotch. I laughed and decided to go get a cake too. I noticed a terrible accident not far from the cake shop but I didn't think much of it. Two, three, four hours pass by and I hear nothing from her. I panic and call her parents, her friends, no one has heard from her. Then I remember the accident and ask around... my darling wife...' Doctor Audu's voice breaks.

Kosi places a comforting hand on his shoulder.

'And I got a text message from her gynecologist congratulating us.' He sniffed. 'Turns out the reason why Adora got so upset that night was because she was already pregnant. She was trying to see how I would feel about it since we didn't plan to have more kids.'