Don't Care If I Sound Crazy (A Daltiana Story)

~Chapter 124~

tw ⚠️

"Mom, I have been having this recurring dream about a man, a girl who's slightly older than me, and a boy who seems younger than me but a little older than Leonel," Imogen told me.

"Tell me more."

"The man has green eyes and light brown hair. The girl looks pretty similar to both you and me, but she has green eyes like the man's. The boy looks like Dad but has your nose," she described, "The man had constantly been reminding me to always be kind to you and to make you happy. Both the boy and girl were always excited to see me. Sometimes, they also come to my dreams separately or just the two of them."

I gasped. No way.

"Mom, what's wrong? Do you know who they are? Do you have the same dreams too?" she asked, confused and I lightly nodded.

"Imogen, there's something I actually need to tell you," I said to her and she stayed quiet to listen.

"You're not actually my first child, you have an older half sister who died in a miscarriage in 2018. Her name is Eleanor, I was 16 weeks pregnant when I lost her. I was told that I could no longer get pregnant, even if I do get pregnant, I'm at risk of miscarrying. The man you saw was her dad, Malcolm, he died from an accidental overdose a few months later. I broke up with him a few days after her death. He caught me cutting myself and attempting to end my life and I decided to end my relationship with him, because it broke him to see me in that state, I just couldn't put him in even more pain. Your dad and I named Leonel's middle name after him, since Mac Miller was his stage name," I explained as I tried to hold in my tears. It's been 18 years, but it still hurts to talk about it.

"S-so I'm not actually your first child?" she asked, confused. I lightly nodded and she embraced me into a hug. "I'm so sorry you had to go through all that."

"Don't be sorry, Piccolina, I'm feeling a lot better now," I reassured.

"You're truly the strongest person I know," she lightly smiled.

"I'm so grateful to have you as my daughter," I whispered into her ear, "You know, after I broke up with Eleanor's dad, I was just fucked up. I didn't know what I was doing and started dating another guy. He was sweet and caring at first, and we got engaged just after a month of dating. After the engagement, he was starting to get abusive. He really wanted me to get pregnant with his child, he didn't know about my problems getting pregnant. First, he stopped using a condom, then he forced me to get off birth control. He would then rape me at least once a week and would beat me and call me names if I disobeyed him or if the pregnancy tests turned out negative. It was just complete hell. I was finally free when he left me after finding out about my infertility, but the fear was still haunting me. He still had the nerve to come back and assault me two years later when I was pregnant with you. I was in so much pain and was bleeding so much. I almost couldn't make it, I was unconscious for hours, and you were even pronounced dead a few days later. Thank goodness you came back to life."

"Oh my gosh," she said quietly, "Where is he now? Is he still roaming around freely?"

"He's locked up, don't worry," I reassured, "he's sentenced to 25 years to life in prison for trespassing, assault, and attempted murder. We have a permanent restraining order against him if he ever gets out, so he has to stay at least 100 yards from us, our workspace or school, and our properties. Leo and Fran were also included in the restraining order the moment they were born."

"Thank goodness," she sighed in relief, "but was he also charged for all those rape and abuse you had to go through?"

"No, I never had the courage to tell anyone except for you and your dad. Your Nonna and my closest friends don't know about it either. I've had the courage now, but I guess it's too late to take a legal action, because it's been 18 years."

"That son of a bitch!" she groaned.

"Don't worry, we're safe now," I reassured.

"I just have one more question, is the boy Oliver?" she asked and I lightly nodded.

"Did you actually see them when you were, you know, in a coma?" she asked quietly.

"I actually did, they were with me the whole time. Eleanor's dad told me to go back, because it's not time for me to go yet. I refused to at first, but I realized that he was right when I heard you and your dad's cries. I realized that I couldn't put you and your dad through that pain."

"Y-you came back for me and Dad?" she asked and I nodded. Tears streamed down her face and I held her tight.

"T-thank you so much," she cried.

"You don't have to thank me, you know?" I lightly smiled, "You're the reason why I'm still here. Besides, I owe my life to you, I wouldn't have survived if you didn't find me."

"I was so scared," she sobbed, "I can still remember everything, starting from seeing you passed out on the bathroom floor, seeing foam coming out of your mouth, to Dad performing CPR on you and seeing you lying on the hospital bed surrounded by machines to keep you alive."

"Shhh... it's all over now, you're safe in my arms," I cooed.

"Don't leave me!" she sobbed as she began shaking and hyperventilating. I immediately held her close to my chest and rubbed her back. Her heart was pounding in her chest.

"I'm not going anywhere Piccolina, I promise," I whispered into her ear. I began singing one of her favorite songs as a kid and her breathing and heart rate started to slow down.

"Baby, what's wrong?" Dalton asked as he walked into the living room.

"She had a panic attack," I mouthed and he nodded. I softly kissed Imogen's head and she wiped her tears away.

"I love you," she said quietly. "I love you more, Piccolina."

"Please do tell us if your thoughts are bothering you," Dalton said to her, "I know they sometimes pop during the most random times, but we're always willing to listen and help you, I promise."

"Thanks Dad."