BTS JIN Oneshots 《COMPILATION》✓

the ex I never had

Another familiar scenery flash into my sight. The amazing view of our own country, the mesmerizing nature. It's been awhile since we leave for overseas schedule and everyone was so excited about it. Now after everything finished, here we are back to our home again. Seoul, South Korea.

It has been almost two years since our last time being here. The airport feels so familiar yet so new. We missed this. I missed this. I wish it will be getting even more better. We should get back on track, that's the only thing that keep me alive, not just existing.

The crowd was expectedly there. Even though it supposed to be private schedule for public, seems like they still managed to get information about our schedule from media or maybe some 'insider'. It's scary, not knowing how people around us was actually took advantage of us. All of us were draining and tired, we don't have any energy to deal with this. I wanna go home and lay on my bed while hugging RJ.

"Why are you here?" instead of RJ, it was her who welcoming me home.

A pair of brown warm eyes, faded freckles that I always adore, my favourite curly locks fall on her shoulder, everything stay the same but not the heart.

"Welcome home guys and I miss you Seokjin." Winnie, our mutual friend and a close friend with history...?

"Hey, Win." the boys greet her before heading to their own room except Taehyung, Namjoon and Hoseok, they went to their own separate house.

"We all are tired, can you come over some other time? Also it's near dawn, why are you still out?" trying my best not to losing my temper on her, I fake a smile since the genuine one was long gone after everything that she did.

"I know and that's why I'm here. I told you I miss you and I know you miss me too, Seokjin." my mind went blank as soon as she holds both of my hands with hers.

What did she just say?

"Go home, it's late." I pull away my hands from her grip and attempt to walk pass through her but she still trailing behind me while calling my name.

"Please, give me a chance. Seokjin?"

"I'll do anything."

"I'll listen to you."

"I promise."

"I still love you!" her last tantrum makes me halt on my steps. Both of us were finally arrived in my personal bedroom.

"Are you hearing yourself? You still love me? Miss Choi Winnie, stop acting like we had a terrible break up when we were never together. I haven't spoken to you, haven't seen you in months. We're back at our own stuffs, so why are you here now and throwing tantrums?"

"I'm sorry for the past but we can start over again. Let's start a new page together. I promise I'll be better. We have something, Seokjin! You know it damn well and a-at least we should talk it out. You should talk to me if you really want us to end like th-"

"I didn't think I had to let you know we were done? You always have your time to tell everybody your side of the story without even thinking of my feelings. So why should I care?"

"Because you love me! I knew it, why you keep lying to yourself? Does all the time we spent together was meaningless to you?"

"You came over often and slept over. We were never sober when we're together. Whenever I read our texts, we were cool we were good, at least I thought so but I guess we're not. All was never real enough for you to be mad. If you really want me, if you really want something more for us, then you should've asked rather than go around throwing dirt on my name. You think I wouldn't know about it?"

"N-No, I never do that-fck it. It wasn't my intention! People could misinterpret our words, you know that damn thing fckg well, why can't you understand me?"

"Then why did you ditch me without any explanation? Why you didn't try to reach out for me these months? Why it has to be today after I've forgotten about you? You know why? Because it wasn't love. What we had wasn't love and I hate to admit it but I have to. It's never gonna matter anymore what you gonna say about us. Don't try to turn this into more than it was. Would you please stop acting like the ex I never had?"

Tears fell down on her cheeks even more. It was the view that I hate the most. I hate her tears the most and the fact that I'm the one who caused it makes it even worst. What should I do? It has to be like this.

I cried for her, I cried for her when she doesn't even turn back and look at me. She gave me false hope and doubts. She used my sincere feeling to get what she wants then after she's done using me, she throws me away like some broken toy.

"Y-you're tired Seokjin, you didn't mean everything you said. Let's talk again when yo-"

"Get out of our house right now. Never come back. You're not welcome in this house anymore."

That night I kick her out from our dorm and from my heart as well.

I deserved to be loved but not like this.

•••

A/N: inspired by ex i never had by LANY. Please do check the song out on the media up there, the stripped version hit more than the original one T.T