Drowning Desires

thirty six

Adrien

Maura and I spent the rest of the night tangled in each other and the sheets. The food lay forgotten on the table, each other were the only meal.

We couldn't seem to get enough of each other. Every round was full of passion and love.

Maura now lay on my chest, breathing softly in her sleep. I stared at her and my heart twitched. God, she was the most beautiful girl that I had ever laid eyes on.

And despite all she had been through, she kept fighting, even when all she wanted to do with give up.

We were perfect for each other. Bringing out the best in each other in the worst ways possible as Maura had said.

The idea she had come up with last night had nearly made my heart burst.

She stirred, blinking softly against the morning light. She groaned, dropping her head back onto my chest.

"Good morning princess." I chuckled. She huffed and turned her head completely between the pillows and my side.

"What time is it?" She asked, her voice muffled.

"6:00." I answered, looking at my phone.

Maura groaned, yet sat up. Her long brown hair tumbled down her shoulders. I reached up and wove my fingers through it just because I could.

She watched my every move. Then brought her stunning green eyes up to mine slowly. She swallowed, offering me a soft smile. "You ready to do this?" She asked.

A gentle chill swept over my bare body. I looked away, out of the window, and into the lightening morning sky. "As ready as I can be." I replied softly.

I stood and gathered my clothes, slipping them on slowly. My mind was distant, I knew my eyes were wandering when Maura appeared in-front of me and put a gentle hand to my cheek.

She offered me no words of comfort, her presence was enough to let me take a deep breath.

Together, we left the cabin, now full of new memories, placed beside the ones I had made with Nate during our days of smoking and drinking inside.

We reached my motorbike. The sun was steadily rising, painting the clouds in hues of pink and oranges.

My cheeks were red from the slight bite of the morning chill.

I climbed on first, Maura behind me in a way that had become so normal. I gripped onto the handlebars, not sure if I could begin the journey.

Maura's arms around my waist squeezed gently, telling me it was ok. That I was ok now.

I exhaled, my breath visible. I turned on the bike and took off.

My eyes watered from the wind whipping across my face, and from the trip we were about to make.

Our destination came into view ten minutes later. My heart was racing as I slid of the bike, hand in hand with Maura.

I took my first step past the gates for the very first time and stared at the rows and rows of gravestones before us.

Our feet crunched against the gravel as we walked down the path, lined with great, gentle, oak trees, swaying slightly in the breeze.

We took a right, and a left. I knew where I was going for I had been told how to get here after his funeral I had been too distraught to attend. I had never been brave enough to come, until now.

We stopped in front of a grey gravestone. Newly polished with white flower scattered across the bottom.

Nate's grave.

I feel to my knees before it. Tears blurred my vision. I had not yet allowed myself to cry for him. But with Maura with me, I could let myself take a deep breath and move on.

Maura took my face gently in her hands and turned my face to her. "I'll be waiting over there." She whispered, nodding her head to the main path. She kissed me on the cheek and left me alone with my best friend for the last time.

I sat in silence for a few minutes, my tears growing steady and full.

"You would have loved her Nate. You would have told me how much of an idiot I was for not telling her how I felt sooner. You would have hit me over the head for all the awful things I said and did to her." I said.

"Hell, you would have tried to kiss her just to make me jealous enough to push you away and kiss her myself." I snorted.

You know I would have. Only one of us had balls in our friendship and it wasn't you. I could have sworn I heard Nate's voice in my head, joking and lively as it always had been.

"I loved her from the moment she stood up against me and didn't let my shit bother her. She didn't back away from the mess I was."

Bro, she is literally perfect for you in every aspect. I will rise from this grave and smash your head with a shovel if you fuck it up. I had no doubt he would, but I had no intentions of doing anything to hurt Maura again.

"God, I miss you man." I said, shaking my head.

How could you not, who else have you found to put up with your crappy taste in music. Always joking. 

"I'm so sorry that I couldn't do more for you that night. I tried to help you, but I didn't try hard enough."

Man, you did the best you could, and you got a hot mugshot in the process as well as an amazing chick, be happy, without me. Let me go.

I placed my hand on the tombstone, carving Nate's name with my fingers.

"Goodbye Nate." I whispered, my voice cracking.

There was no reply other than the gentle howl of the wind.

I stood up and withdrew a few steps. Nate's voice didn't appear in my head again, because it was never
there, only my own voice, trying to bring Nate's cheerful personality back.

But it wouldn't ever come back. The lump in my throat eased. I had accepted it, the loss of my friend through thick and thin. I could move on, have him as a distant memory that I could look back on and smile.

I smiled to myself, the tears in my eyes finally subsiding. I felt a gentle hand at my back, I looked to my side and saw Maura, smiling gently at the grave before us.

She bent down and laid a few flowers she had gathered while waiting for me and whispered a few words, too quietly for me to hear. If I thought I couldn't love this girl more, I was wrong.

Maura stood and gripped my hand softly. "Ready?" She asked, looking up at me.

"Thank you." I kissed her on the forehead.

And hand in hand, we walked away from Nate's grave. I could have sworn I heard a gentle whoop of happiness in the wind.

~~~~~
Authors Note.

Before you all get scared, this ISNT the last chapter, I think there is maybe two or three more. Maura and Adrien's story isn't just over yet :)