I SEE 'YOU' , The Woman With Greenish Blue Eyes

1

Feeling the heaviness of my body I couldn't bare to move seeing the way it hurt, how I even thought that I was a robot I didn't know but the way I could do things sometimes convey to think that.

The grumble in my belly made me scrunch my nose feeling too tired to do something about it I stayed still not moving a part of me.

' You will have to stop treating yourself like that Liz this isn't healthy'.

Doing the one that didn't hear the scolding of my inner voice I closed my eyes letting my senses take in the vibe of the day, like always it felt silent, everything was and I like it that way, it was like a break in time like everything went still putting me out of the world.

I like it that way, social gathering never was something I could support, loneliness was peaceful.

Puffing the air out of my mouth I did nothing to move completely ignoring my not so happy inner self and the request of my belly to eat, sometimes that voice could keep going on all day if I commit the stupidity to acknowledge it.

Emitting a chuckle I thought back when it started talking to me, people sometimes would call me names, like who can talk and smile alone like they were with someone? That was always me in a world that doesn't accept difference. Even my family didn't understood at time and will certainly never do.

Closing my eyes I tried to doze off but it was like Riley, that my inner self name, decided he had enough of my behavior, I felt a sudden surge of pain in all my body like something was compressing me with all the weight of the world. Holding onto my stomach I cried out in pain breathing heavily, I waited for it to pass not moving laying on the floor like a baby in its mother belly.

'How about you stop that! I recall you that you are literally drowning my battery Liz! I don't have to remind you that you are have to feed yourself!' even though it hurts to see her like that Riley knew using pain sometime was handy to make his avatar to get in action most of the times sadly when it comes to feeding herself.

"Will you shut up for once Riley! I'm feeling so tired now, I will eat later."

Slamming my hand on the floor I closed my eyes sleep finding it's way in my mind,  there in the middle of my kitchen just like that I couldn't get why I was doing that to myself but it was out of my power I knew if I didn't have Riley I would have been death long ago.

'you said that in the morning, now it is 4pm you haven't eaten Liz. If I didn't knew better I will said you are on some diet! Who in their right mind will forget to eat?!... You! of course.'

Doing the one who heard nothing, I rolled on my side to face the sliding window, its tainted glass clouded the light of the day making it appeared like it was already darker outside but the small gab that was left opened showed the light of the day but the scent that it brought was one I would have recognized from afar.

Sighing at it, I breathed out my eyes now closed feeling a bit defeated thinking of the efforts I have to do now. My bare hand now facing the cold floor I stood like that for a moment my heart doing all sort of silent thread to the weather.

"Great! Just great!"

Mumbling shouting I pushed myself up using all I was left with as energy only to speed up out as the wind started blowing faster out doing that noise I didn't knew it could do, like it was trying to communicate with us humans, at time I wondered what it was saying.

On my way out I glanced through the window of my one bedroom apartment only to be a little taken aback then started running to remove the clothes I had put to dry down on the first floor.

Running in the stairs all I could think about was " I don't want to rewash my clothes.'" like a mantra I kept saying that still careful to not fall in the stairs.