My lips touch his again and it's a lot more rough. I know we both need this, we both crave the others touch. It's intoxicating. He pushes the straps of my dress down to my hips and he reaches out and palms my breasts in both his hands.
A small moan...
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This was not how I planned the day to go. First, seeing Aria looking beautiful in a bikini and pretending to hate her. It made sense to me, if she could pretend to like me, I can pretend to hate her.
Then, barely having a connection with my best friend. A random girl approaching me and flirting with me even though I clearly wasn't interested. And to top it off, a dickhead dude was obviously staring at Aria's boobs like they were cupcakes. It didn't make me feel good that she was here— with me— but I couldn't have her.
I couldn't have her if she hates me, and she does.
Amelia was being clingy throughout the entire beach trip but Aria didn't seem to mind, which made my heart ache even more. She didn't care, nothing I did would make her care. And it fucking killed.
It also annoyed me to see her laughing with dickhead dude, little did he know, she was probably just using him. Or maybe she genuinely liked him and it was me that was the problem.
When we were playing twister, I was sporting a hard-on the entire time because I had a great view of Aria's ass the entire time. There was a point, right before I fell, where she shoved her ass into my groin. It was unintentional, obviously, but it didn't exactly help with the fucking third leg I had.
And then truth or dare. Aria knew that I lost my virginity to her but I lied about it. I hope she felt the same pain I felt when she lied throughout our entire relationship. Petty, I know. But when she was dared to kiss Duke because of fucking Amelia, I felt my blood boil. I knew that if she did, I probably would have bashed his face in for kissing my girl. No. Aria is not my girl, she never was.
That's why I was pleasantly shocked when she declined and walked away from the game. Then I realised that Aria doesn't kiss any random guy, so she chose me. She chose to lie and deceive me. She chose to break my heart. She chose that. And then I was angry that she didn't kiss Duke. Stupid, I know. Maybe it was the alcohol talking, or the tobacco I smoked.
I saw the look of disappointment on Aria's face when she saw me smoking. It broke me, but I have to put up this facade for another three months. Because if I don't, I'll be vulnerable and weak and she could take advantage of that. I wouldn't put it past her.
Laura's girlfriend, Rose, arrived a little while after Aria left and she seems like a really nice person. I didn't talk to her a lot but I saw her interactions with the others.
"Hey, why don't you show me your room?" Amelia whispers as she trails her nails up my arm.
"My room looks like rest of the cabin." I shut her down quickly.
It was obvious she wanted a quick fuck, I just wasn't the person to give it to her.
"Come on, I'm sure there're many differences..." Amelia whispers in an attempted seductive voice and I finally lose my cool.
I instantly stand up and glare at her before leaving the room. I was tired, angry, hurt and really fucking annoyed. As I walked past Aria's room, her door was slightly ajar and I found myself looking in. Her body was huddled on her bed, on top of the covers. Sighing, I walk in and carefully pick up the blanket on the end of the bed and throw it over her. Part of me wanted to give her a small kiss on the forehead but I know she wouldn't appreciate it.
Gazing at her one last time, I turn around and walk out of her room.
It's depressing when you realise that the person you told everything to has no idea what's going on in your life.
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