"I hate you sidharth, aap ne uska proposal kaise accept kiya, mere baare mein kaise nahin socha, jaante haina mujhe aapke qareeb bhi kisi ka hona pasandh nahi tha phir aap ke upar mere ilawa aur mujhse zayada haq jatane wale kaise tolerate karte, I felt myself breaking with every passing second my heart stuck in my throat, I couldn't breath, my heart was numb, you were holding her why didn't you think about me, I was standing there witnessing everything shatter from my heart to dreams to happiness to love" she told, falling down sidharth hurriedly crushed her against his chest while she loudly sobs breaking him.
"I wished to die before letting you go, couldn't watch you two happily getting married. I couldn't tolerate hence cowardly thought of escaping from terrible situation before anybody would learn my mental state. I went to live with my best friend zoya, she tried explaining and asking me to let you go, I could not five lettered words look very simple to read but it takes lifetime to pull urself through darkness and come back to happiness" painful tears, trickle down it was unbearable for him to suppress emotions and pretend to be strong.
"It took every ounce of me to recollect broken pieces of my heart and attend your wedding. I was pretending to smile when I came across you everything shattered from my confidence to courage. I held back tears didn't wanted to destroy your wedding or happiness. I wasn't so selfish, amma jaan knew my craze of marrying you, I had told her many times to ask my hand for you she was going to when both of you announced" her voice choked.
His eyes widened "she knew how insanely and selflessly I loved you she told me to back off, since I was nobody, to interfere between true lovers. I agreed she demanded me to wear something heavy and look happiest" looked way too drained "how could she ask me sidharth ?" cupping tear stricken face. It was getting unbearable "how could you marry her ?" she yelled.
"I was supposed to be your bride haina aap kaise uske huwe ..mere badle us ne aapke naam ka shaadi ka joda pehna tha, mere badle saman aap ke paas baithe huwe thi" constantly shedding agonising tears their hearts ached too much yet sidharth heard her placing dagger on his chest.
"Qubool hai, sune ki himmat na thi isliye wahan se uth kar chale gaye mere peeche amma jaan bhi darr kar aye kyunke main hosh kho baitha thi, mera jism, rooh aur dil jal raha tha, itne takleef horahe thi ke saans laina mushkil horaha tha, nafrat horahe thi mujhe khud se, sabse zayada saman se gusse mein akar chudiyaan utaar kar phaik de, jhumke utaare aise jaise tayaar ya phir sajne ka haq maine kho diya ho, saman ne cheen liya ho"
"Dil chah raha tha usko jaan se maar doon, sidharth main pagal hogaye thi amma jaan ke sambhalne par bhi na ruke, mujh jaise ghatiya behan kisi ko naseeb nahi hone chahiye" she remorsefully, looked at him.
"Nahi mera bacha, tu sabse pyaare hai 😘" leaning closer, he assured.
"Nahi hoon main pyaare aap jaane ke baad mujhse nafrat karainge" weeps grabbing his collar and crying relentlessly.
"Kabhi tujhse nafrat nahi karunga !" her eyes sparkled.
"Sache ?" asked for reassurance and sidharth does pecking her lips.
"I cursed her shikayat kare apne parents ke saath woh kyun nahi marr gaye uske marr ne ki duaa kare maine sidharth" loudly, sobs holding him tight.
"I hate myself for loving you too much, itne deewane aur andhe hogaye thi aapke pyaar mein sahi aur galat ka fadak bhool gaye" sidharth didn't react feeling pathetic and hating himself for destroying her innocent love.
"Amma jaan, ne mera bohut khayal rakha, samjhaya ke hamara deen ijazat nahin daita ke shaadi shuda mard ke liye apne dil mein jazbaat rakhe main khud ko samjha loon ke aap mere kabhi nahi ho sakte isliye unse wada bhi kiya jiske baad maine javed sai nazdikiyaan aur aap se dooriyan banane ka soch liya phir bhi aap baaz na aye" she cutely pouted.
"I always loved you shehnaaz, I didn't recognise until your attitude towards our bond, friendship and relation altered. I didn't recognise till you avoided your best friend all of a sudden began developing connection with junaid it was surprising more over heart wrenching. I didn't want to accept therefore started living in constant denial away from you and saman" he doesn't, feel like burying down his side of story hence thought of opening up and he did shehnaaz deserves to know his pain and inner turmoils too.
"I was stuck between heart and mind, like a coward started avoiding saman honestly I feel horrible for being mean to her she never deserved it escaped her questions of starting husband and wife relationship or what's bothering me due to which I am always restless or distressed" he explained.
"I never replied, cowardly skipped her questions and pretended to be tired, being an amazing friend she never forced me instead gave me space, never treated saman as my life partner although she deserved love. I couldn't my heart was yearning to be with you, I started regretting my decision, bichare samajh gaye ke main usko nahi chahta kyunke uske saath baith kar bhi sirf tujhe dekhta tha, honestly I hate myself, she didn't deserve to be ignored"
"I understood insaan ko kabhi bhi shaadi jaise mushkil decision, jaldi nahin laine chahiye, soch samajh kar decide karna chahiye" she nodded.
"Tune bhi laine ki koshish kare kyun shehnaaz na pehle apne mohabbat ke liye lade aur nahi us waqt jab mujhe tere saath ki sabse zayada zaroorat thi"
"Tune mujhe saman ka kyun hone diya ?" he asked, shaking her shoulders .. snapping her back on earth "mujh par haq rakh kar toh dekhte" she gasped.
"Jab sabke samne qabool karne ki baare aye toh mujhe chod kar junaid ke saath shaadi karne ke zid kyun kare ?" he asked, desperately waiting for an answer however she apologetically looks away .. remembering her state of mind how she was rebellious and emotionally devastated.
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Done ❤️🤗 keep loving and supporting my work :)
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ANKAHE ALFAAZ (COMPLETED)
RomanceThere are times you fall in love with someone not knowing whether or not the person feels the same for you. But if it's a childhood love you are somewhere confident that the person will love you back some day. What if that some day comes but that yo...
