The Forgotten Goddess

Nightmares and Memories

I curled up and fell asleep.

1st Person POV (Bucky)

I walked over to the living room after Lex left to go to her room. I immediately saw my boyfriend and walked over. Cuddling up to him, I lay my head on his chest. I felt his arms wrap around me and a soft kiss placed on the top of my head.

"I worry about her too, Buck." Steve said, sensing what I was worried about. I sighed.

"She's not opening up. It's not good for her to keep everything bottled up. I wish she would tell someone, I wish she would talk to me, but I know she has that voice in her head telling her she's going to be a bother if she opens up. She's my closest friend, besides you of course, and I hate seeing her hurting." Steve's hand made soft soothing patterns on my back.

We lay there for a while, content in each other's company.

Worry began to gnaw at me again.

"What if she never opens up, Stevie?" I ask, voicing my fears.

"Don't give up on her. Show her you're not going to leave her. Show her that you'll be there for her no matter what. Go check on her even after she says she's fine." I sit up and look into his eyes.

"That's what I did for you, Buck. You've gotta show her you're not gonna abandon her." I smiled at him.

"I love you, you know that right?" I ask as I kiss his cheek.

"I sure hope you do. Now go check on her, we all know she's not fine." I pulled him in for a kiss before standing up.

As I reached her door, I heard soft cries.

"Please, it hurts. Please stop. I promise I'll listen." It broke my heart. I walked into the room and saw her curled up on the floor. She started to hyperventilate and clutch her left hand tightly. I walked over to her.

"Lex, you gotta wake up now. It's just a nightmare. You're safe." She didn't wake. I saw her pulling on the skin of her wrist so much that it started to tear.

"Lex, doll, you gotta wake up." I grabbed her hand away from her wrist and noticed something silver but chose to ignore it.

"LEX!" I shouted and she bolted up. Tears stained her face. Her hand immediately started to mess with the skin on her left wrist, but I grabbed it gently.

"Let's go bandage this up." I said softly. She just shook her head.

"Come on, doll. This could easily get infected if we leave it unattended." I tried to reason with her.

"It would if it were real skin and bone." She whispered softly, but my enhanced hearing caused me to be able to hear it anyways.

"If it was real? What do you mean, doll?" I saw her face go pale and she started to tremble.

"Shhhh it's okay. It's okay." I soothe her. She just looks down.

"If it was real then yeah it could get infected." She muttered.

"I don't understand, doll." I saw, gently lifting her chin up to meet my eyes. She just whispered

"I'm sorry."

"For what, doll?" She said nothing, she just started to mess with her wrist again. I pulled her hand away.

"I understand that this may be stressful for you to talk about, but if you keep picking at it it's just going to get worse. Please, you can tell me anything. No judgment." I told her, hoping she would understand.

"It's not real. Just trust me, please." I let her hands go and watched as she started to pull at the skin on her wrist. I went to grab her hand when she started to pull it off but stopped at her look. She pulled all the skin off, but it wasn't skin. Sitting there was a metal hand. Just like mine.

"I'm sorry I never told you. I'm sorry I made you forget. I'm sorry I forced you to leave it alone." Apologies tumbled from her lips.

"Hey, hey. You don't have to apologize. It's okay. I am a little confused though. What do mean you forced me to forget?" I watched her face fall.

She took a shaky breath and began to tell me about what happened. As she kept talking I started to remember more.

~~Flashback to Bucky's memory~~

It was getting late and she still wasn't back. I knew they were going to punish her for trying to escape. I wish she had made it. I wish she had gotten out. She doesn't deserve to be here.

I could hear faint screaming. I ignored it, it wasn't uncommon.

Hours passed. Finally, the cell door clanged open. I watched as she was tossed in. One the doors shut behind her, I ran over to her but she just moved away from me. She shook her head at me, signaling that she wanted to be alone. I turned away as she grabbed the small pile of clothes and slipped them on.

When I turned back around, I saw a thick metal band wrapped around her wings. Her beautiful delicate wings.

"Doll?" I whispered causing her to turn slightly in my direction.

"What's on your wings?" I was horrified at the thought of what they did to her.

"Tried to fly away, they stopped it." Was all she said. I took note of her scratchy voice and wondered if it was her that I had heard screaming. She walked over to the bed and lay down, facing away from me and I could faintly see the new scars on her back through the too thin shirt they gave her. I lay down behind her and gently wrapped my arms around her. I immediately sat up when she let out a cry of pain. Gently pulling her up, I looked at her.

I grabbed her shoulders gently but firmly when she tried to leave. I could see the tears in her eyes and I moved my hands from her shoulders to her hands, to try and make her more comfortable. I immediately felt the difference in the left one, it felt harder and colder. I let go as soon as she winced.

"What happened?" I asked, concerned.

"Promise me something, Bucky?" Her eyes were glowing with power. All I could say was

"Anything."

"Promise me you'll forget about this, never bring it up, and go to sleep?" Something clicked in my brain and I replied

"I promise." As soon as I said those words, my mind went blank. I don't know why I was over there, but I decided to go to sleep. I waited for a little for her to join but eventually gave in to the darkness.

~~Flashback over~~

I looked at her in disbelief.

"Why?" I whispered. She looked down, tears falling.

"I panicked. That was the night they broke me. I didn't want you to see what they had done or how I was feeling. So I resorted to my magic. It hurt me to do that to you." She confessed, but I was pissed. My mind had been tampered with enough, now she's telling me she's part of it.

"All those times I noticed something different but couldn't ask was because of that?" She nodded.

I couldn't believe it, I thought she would never do that. I just stood up and left before I said something I would regret.

Little did I know how much I would regret that choice.

A/N: There's Chapter 32! I don't have a whole lot to say other than please don't be too upset with Bucky. He's just hurt.

Hope you enjoyed!

Love y'all! <3

Kari (pen name)