bad company || B.E

meant to be

savannah's POV :

for the first time in a while.. i felt at home. right now in this moment i think i realized i always do when i'm with her. billie. it's billie. it's always fucking been billie.

i guess i was just trying to pick up the pieces with scott because even though our love felt like a never ending rollercoaster of disaster, i craved it in a way. i really hate to say it but it's very true. and i think i'm finally ready to own up to it.

for some odd reason i got so used to that rollercoaster that i didn't think i deserved anything else. then that self deprecation turned into a sort of routine. then the routine turned into an addiction. the rollercoaster is all i ever had. it's all i was used to. and it turned into what i thought i wanted in a relationship.

but none of it was healthy. none of it was good for men's none of it was fulfilling. none of it was okay. at all.

but as we drove around. as she listened to my cries. as we talked for what seemed like days on end. i finally realized...

it's us.

it's always been us.

"i'm glad you finally realize all that." billie whispered. my head and eyes quickly shot up. i know i did not just say that out loud. "what?" i asked. "i think you fell asleep and you mumbled a little bit." she said followed by her little laugh.

"what did i say?" i asked, "what did you hear?" she could tell i was embarrassed. she laughed again. "couldn't make out that much but at the end i heard 'it's always been us'." i smiled stupidly and sighed as i dramatically flopped my head back on her shoulder.

"don't be embarrassed baby that shit was adorable." she assured me, "it sucks that he's gone but now that he is i'm glad you have your head on straight." i looked at her confused. "i hope you know i didn't realize this just because he left me."

"yeah? then what?" she asked, "when and what made you finally come to the conclusion that you're dating a toxic abusive manipulative asshole? was it me telling you over and over again? was it his whole personality changing once you took him back? did he hit you again? did he-"

"shut the fuck up.. billie." i interrupted, in a serious tone. she looked at me like a lost dog. "what lovey?" she asked. she went to grab my arm and i slowly pulled it away. "i didn't mean it like that." she said lowly. "its fine." i said, "your voice just started to seem more aggressive like you were trying to get in my head or something."

i looked up at her and she began to pull over. "i'm sorry. i wasn't trying to be aggressive i'm just annoyed i guess. i'm annoyed over the fact that i could have done so much more to stop all this shit from happening and i didn't." she said. "no. none of what happened to me was your fault. i didn't listen. that's fully on me."

"if we getting technical, it's his fault. none of this would happened if he hadn't abused you in the first place." i smiled. "i guess you're right." i said, "but in all honesty, the reason i'm realizing all of this now isn't from him leaving it's from being with you again."

"deadass?" she asked blushing. i nodded. "i've been going through billie withdrawals whether i like to admit it or not. i really missed us and it made me realize that i really think we're.."

"meant to be?" billie asked, putting her arm around me. "meant to be." i simpered. i brought my head up and we looked at each other for a few seconds. "i like.. really wanna kiss you right now." billie said as a huge closed smile grew across her face. i laughed lightly as i brought my lips to hers.

i really.. really missed her. i missed us. i missed feeling actually happy. i missed this.

word count : 694
an : i know it's a super short chapter but i really wanted a filler right here. sorry, but i hope you liked it at least.