Champagne Problems (Ransom Drysdale)

Chapter 23 - Never Grow Up

A frustrated shriek came from upstairs as Ransom could hear Effie having another temper tantrum. It was the fifth one this week, and it was all over the fact that no clothes now fitted her as her stomach grew by the day. Sometimes he forgot that there was actually a baby in there.

Her hormones were in overdrive, one day she was screaming and crying and the next she was calm and collected. It was all too much for him to handle at times, goodness knows how he was going to cope trying to stop a small human from crying all the time. If he couldn't do so with his wife then he was sure that he'd set himself up for failure.

"Eff? You ok?" he asked, finally feeling like it was safe for him to enter dangerous territory once she'd stopped shouting.

She was on the bed, tears streaming down her face as she sat simply wearing his blue sweater and glaring at a pile of clothes in front of her.

"This is all that fits me right now..." she looked at him and burst into tears.

He ran a hand down his face. "Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm fucking sure! Do you think I'd be sat here crying over them if I hadn't tried them all on!" she snapped and then began to cry again. "I'm sorry! I just look like a beach ball!"

"No you don't, you look beautiful." He sighed and looked at a dress that was clearly too small for her size now. "Ok, keep the sweater on for now." and went to walk out.

She watched him, "Where are you going?"

"I'll be back."

"Can you bring me some ice cream?" she yelled after him

"Yep!" he called back

"And milkshake! Strawberry!"

"On it!"

In order to stop the tantrums he'd need to keep her happy, and if that meant going out and trying to find some remotely appealing maternity clothes then he'd do it. He was used to her sending him on errands, mainly if she was craving something. Paola had ordered at least ten tubs of ice cream so they wouldn't run out as quickly. They didn't need that much, all Effie needed was a couple of spoonful's and it would satisfy her, however their housekeeper meant well. She also wanted as much of a quiet life as Ransom did.

Trying to find clothes had been hell. He had no idea what she wanted and ended up getting a variety of dresses, tops and jeans that he knew would be her style. By the time he returned home he was exhausted from the whole process.

Effie looked at him and then at what he produced. "You went and got me clothes?" her face filled with astonishment. Never in a million years did she expect Ransom to do something such as this. 

"If it shuts you up then it was worth it." he smirked and passed her the milkshake. "Got your favourite too..."

Immediately she was in tears again. "That is the sweetest thing you've ever done for me..."

"Happy wife, happy life – now I need a drink after what I've just experienced."

"Wait." She said and shifted from the bed. Coming over to him and giving him a long kiss. "Thank you."

"Drink your milkshake, take a nap. Please, I need some peace."

She lightly whacked his arm. "You try growing a human. It's exhausting."

"So is living with you."

"And yet you're still here?"

Touche.