𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐘 𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 | 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐱

♡ t w e n t y f i v e ♡

Changbin plopped down on one of the velvet chairs in the living room of his and Felix's chambers and brought his knees to his chest. He wrapped his hands around his legs and laid his head on top of them.

For a moment, he stared blankly at a beautiful oil painting of a toddler in a garden across him. Normally, he would smile looking at it because the boy was actually his fiancé playing in the royal gardens when he was younger, but at that moment he couldn't.

Even though there was no particular emotion he could pinpoint he felt blue; his mind filled with everything and nothing at the same time.

First, Jisung asked him to think about having their wedding on the same day as he and Minho. Second, the maid implicated he either used Felix to get into the royal family or that Felix didn't love him.

Of course, he didn't doubt Felix's intentions. He believed him and instantly pushed the thought away, yet an overwhelming feeling of anxiety arose in his stomach.

What if Felix heard those rumors and doubted his genuity? He said he didn't remember the night of the feast. What if he thought that he took advantage of him?

"Ridiculous," he murmured scolding his own self and bit hard on his bottom lip. Felix would never doubt him. He loved him and he knew Changbin loved him too. But again, what if his feelings was not evident to him? What if the love he felt for the prince was not portrayed in his words and actions?

Tears began to well in Changbin's eyes as he gripped his legs tighter. There was no end to the overflowing spirit-crushing thoughts. His body began to tremble.

Was he even good enough for Felix? He was no one special, just a lowly commoner, a peasant. He had average looks; dark hair and dark eyes just like thousands of people who were not of royal blood. He was also rather short. He was neither talented nor had a charming personality. Everything about him was average in contrast to the prince.

Felix was the complete opposite. He was beautiful. He had a fair complexion that  matched his light blond hair and ocean-blue eyes. To add to his ethereal looks, countless constellation-like freckles adorned his face. Everything was perfect about the prince; from his heart-shaped lips to his fit, tall silhouette. He walked, talked and behaved gracefully. His sunshine-like persona made him even more special.

He deserved someone better than him.

The teardrops wetted the material of Felix's outerwear he still had on. It hurt.

It really hurt.

He let go of his legs and wrapped his hands around his belly. "I'm sorry, little one. I'm so sorry..." he sobbed.

"Changbin, love?"

°•♡°•♡°•♡°•

Hi, hello! 💙

I'm sorry, not sorry for the angsty chapter. I really like to make Changbin suffer, don't I? Thank you for pointing it out wikimluu.

A small disclaimer: dark hair and eyes are beautiful. I don't mean to offend anyone. Every complexion, eye/haircolor and body shape is beautiful. Changbin thinks his features are averege compared to Felix because few people have fair hair/eyes/skin (in the universum) therefore it's considered rare and special just like the Han's blue hair etc.

How was your day? 

I made banoffee pie and gingerbread (cookies). At this point, I live in my kitchen. Yesterday, I made kimchi jjigae/stew and sushi. Kinda random but I reeeeally enjoy cooking/baking.

What about you? What do you enjoy doing in your free time?

As always, thank you for reading and supporting my book. Don't forget to comment and vote.

Have a lovely day/night. 👑