Devotion (#1) | ✓

37. The Doghouses

I remove myself from his grasp, too shocked to attempt to keep myself together. Don't make assumptions, Farrah. Find out the full story, Farrah.

"What are you talking about?" I ask, seeing as those are the only words that make sense to my brain. "What do you mean I need to go back without you?"

"You heard me, Farrah." He deadpans and my heart breaks at the lack of empathy in his tone. How can someone just — "Pack your bag. A car is waiting for you outside." With that, he steps away and enters the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

For a moment, I'm frozen, my eyes stuck on the familiar chandelier above me as I try to gather words in my mind. For once, I'm speechless.

I fall into the bed, my back hunched as I run a hand over my face. What the hell happened at that meeting?

It's when he reenters the room five minutes later that I've managed to gather some of my thoughts.

"I'm not leaving you, Nico."

"It wasn't a question, Farrah. It's for your own safety."

I'm taken aback, my hand pressing against my chest in shock. "No! You pulled me into this! Made me fall in love with you! Promise to stick by you! And now you're pushing me away? What, did he scare you, you little pussy?"

Nico's jaw ticks as he shakes his head and releases a spiteful chuckle, "You must think this is a game, dolcezza." He gets in my face, toe to toe, nose almost pressing against mine and for the first time ever, I'm scared of the man I love, "He will hang you from the ceiling of his basement, carve pieces out of your skin with your teeth then feed you to his dogs. You're the new one to the game, not me."

My hands press against his chest so I can have my space, "Then do something about it, you big bad mafia Don!" I catch myself saying, "You say this as if you don't kill people for a living and do the same damn thing as him! I've just been lucky enough to avoid the doghouses."

"Pack your bag, Farrah."

I fold my arms across my chest, "You think just because you rule everyone else around here that you can just tell me what to do? Guess a-fucking-gain. I signed up for this, Nico. Me. By my own fruition. I stood in front of you that day and told you that I am in this with you. Now it's whether you like it or not."

I can see the steam bellowing from his ears but I couldn't care less. If he won't tell me the full story, there's no reason for me to listen to anything he says.

"You are as stubborn as you are beautiful." He grumbles, hand now moving to hold my neck and I find my eyes closing in comfort. Part of me feels I've won this fight, "And that will be your downfall, Farrah." Those words make my eyes snap open. "If you do not leave, my mother will die, my brothers will die, everyone you know and love will follow suit, including your sister. You ready to be like me and have their blood on your hands?"

My breath hitches.

I sniffle, my tone now lowered, "What did you do at that meeting, Nico?"

He kisses my forehead, "I handled it." I'm pulled into his warm embrace, my body racking with sobs, "If we never see each other again, know that I do this because I love you with every inch of my being. Every cell of my beating heart. I love you so much I'm willing to lose you."

"Then don't." I whisper. "Please don't lose me, Nico."

"I'm sorry, Farrah."

The flight back to Chicago was filled with tears and heart-wrenching sorrow. Questions soar around my mind — so many about the man with an empire that I was a part of for some time.

If it weren't for the eyewitness accounts, I would've thought these past couple of weeks were a fever dream to the fullest extent. But that's what my love for him basically was. A dream that slowly became a nightmare that I'm living in right now.

Maybe it's always been this way and I've just been jaded by him and what I thought we could've been.

Faith always said I had an insane imagination. And now as I stand in front of her house, my cheeks tear stained and a freshly packed suitcase in my grasp, I can't help but feel the brunt force of the entire situation even more.

I'm so stupid to think we would've had a fairytale ending. The house, the kids, the life we both wanted.

It was a mistake.

No, it wasn't.

The door opens, I see my sister's beautiful face and just like that, the flood walls shatter like freshly made glass. As if she already knew, she pulls me into her warm embrace, arms wrapped tight around me as she whispers the words I'd been longing to hear.

"It's okay, sweetheart."

double updaaaatttteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

okay so im in finals week so im either going to finish the entire book within twenty four hours or wait until i get back home on sunday

and there are three more chapters left :)))