Tyed

chapter sixty

In four days, Tyler's mother organised to invite Tyler over to "discuss things". Tyler only asked if Scarlett was going to be there, and his mother said that yes, she was. Presumably, this whole awkward discussion was meant to take place then.

Tyler asked Colby to come with him that day. He didn't tell him that he knew for a fact Scarlett was going to be there. He didn't tell Nancy about this decision either. He told himself he was making the correct decision, that truths would simply have to unveil themselves. As far as Colby knows, his mother's asked to see him and he doesn't know why, so he'd like the moral support. It's not even a lie, Tyler tells himself. It's just an omission. Forgetting to mention the one thing that would make Colby question his whole motivation and perhaps not want to go.

That night, Kali stayed, slept in his room, or so Tyler assumes; he wasn't there. He stayed and watched a movie, and then took two trams and showed up on Colby's doorstep. He gave him a little warning, technically asked, but he was halfway there before Colby said he was fine to come over.

And Tyler was kind of expecting something along the lines of what he was told to expect from Colby on day one. He expected to be in that bedroom intended just for sex, to do some kinky shit- but that was the next morning. He was tied up and fucked hard the next day, it's not like that didn't happen at all, but that night, he and Colby cooked dinner together and got to talking, talked for hours, such that eventually they were just too tired and went to bed- Tyler just sleeping in Colby's own bed like it was nothing. They talked about anything and everything, and the thing about that is that it really was everything; they discussed life philosophies and how morality should work, and in the next breath argued about whether tomatoes were better raw or cooked (and Tyler maintains that Colby is a heathen for just straight up eating them).

And Tyler noticed something in that conversation, noticed something in those words. Tyler said at one point that he'd never left the country, and Colby told him in what seemed like all seriousness that he'd have to come with him on his next business trip, or if they could swing it in Tyler's uni holidays they could go anywhere in the world. And once he noticed it, Tyler didn't stop noticing it. We should go to this restaurant. We should go skiing in the winter. We should, we will. Colby didn't hesitate for a second to assume he and Tyler were going to be together for some time. He wasn't hesitating for a second to invest in their future.

It wasn't like it was an accident, because he did hedge his bets once. He mentioned kids, he said, "if I do have kids again"; not assuming. Not assuming Tyler was okay with that or wanted that. No slip of the tongue. It wasn't like he was saying we and being general; but it also didn't seem like he noticed he was doing it. He just assumed they were going to be together for some time, but kids weren't quite on the table- at least, not until Tyler said so.

And for a moment, Tyler considers what it might be like, if he stays. Would they get married? That felt so very fake. He lets himself imagine it as he's showering the next morning; suits, family, dancing. It seems stupid. Neither of them have a lot of family; who would even come? Trey would be his best man, he supposed. He used to imagine what Kevin would look like getting married; he'd wear the white shirt and the black vest, but his jacket would come off, so would the tie, and his sleeves would be all rolled up; he'd smoosh the cake in Tyler's face.

Colby, well, if his family- whatever existed of it- if they were there, if they were watching, Colby would probably be very careful. He'd keep all the dust off his suit, and well, his wife- Tyler can't imagine Colby at this public wedding marrying a man- he'd keep his hands off her. He imagines Scarlett angrily cutting a cake with shaking hands she's trying to conceal in those dumb gloves of hers. Then he imagines his mother standing next to her instead of Colby, and he sighs.