𝘸𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘣𝘰𝘳𝘴

𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘳𝘵𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘦𝘦

𝘬𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘢𝘭𝘭

My limbs were heavy as rocks, I couldn't lift them up off the bed. I couldn't leave my room, I couldn't leave my house. I've been laying here for past three weeks. Well obviously I've gotten up and showered but it's hard you know? I want to trust him and believe him but how can I?

I have to move on. I have to continue with my life. It was going to take me a long minute but I did it. I got up and went to the bathroom. My hair was a rats nest, literally, I couldn't brush my hair with out it getting caught in the mess. I stripped off my clothes feelings a cold breeze hit my skin. I turned on the water, letting it run for a while.

"It's going to be a good day." I said softly to myself, I had to reassure myself. It was all going to be okay.

I got into the showered letting the water soak into my skin. I took in its warmth. I closed my eyes, seeing him, I saw him scrubbing the shampoo into his hair. I heard him in my mind, him bumping into my showers head and saying it's too short for him. Me laughing and see him bend his knees to be shorter. I laugh some more placing my arms around his neck then kissing his soft wet pink lips.

I opened my eyes feeling my heart pound loudly in my chest. I covered my face beginning to cry again, I was crying hard and loud, but thankfully the water made it seem as if I wasn't crying. It's hard. This is one of the hardest things ever.

When I got out of the shower I got ready for the day, I needed to buy groceries and it's Saturday morning, which means farmers market in the main plaza of San Francisco.

I wore a tight black shirt that I tucked into some classic high waisted jeans. I straightened my hair after I dried it... haven't done that in a while. I did my normal face routine, I didn't add much make up though. I brushed out my eyebrows and added a dot on concealer under my eyes and some mascara of course. That's it.

I grinned softly at myself in the mirror, I put my long brown hair behind my ears and put on some of my classic sweet perfume on my exposed collar bones and behind my ears. I was putting my life back together, very slowly.

I went down stairs slipping on my low top converse and grabbing my tote bag and phone. My car sadly was still not working so I dug around my garage for my bike. Well some physical exercise won't be too shabby. Quickly I put in my earbuds then played my playlist.

As I left my garage I felt my hands tremble. My heart ached knowing that Nicolas' house was right next to mine. Kendall move forward. I gripped the handles tightly and quickly left down the road. I couldn't cry, not anymore. No more tears.

It was nice having the fresh air hit my face, the sky was bright blue and the sun was shining. I heard some birds singing and well.....cars honking. It's going to be a good day.

        I peacefully rode my bike listening to Techno Show by Peach Pit. It felt like summer. Well it was going to be summer soon. 

       I rode for a good 20 minutes until I got to the main plaza. I got off my bike and put it into the bikes racks. I noticed the mass amount of propel scattered around like ants finding food.

       I walked slowly studying each booth trying to find the food I needed. It didn't take long to find fruits and vegetables, it's what mainly was served out for the public to buy.

       Thankfully most of the booths accepted Venmo, I forgot to bring cash. I left in such a rush. I mainly left quickly because I didn't want to bump into him.

        I was leaving the peaches booth when I turned around and bumped into someone. I dropped my bag of peaches. Stupid klutz.

        "Shoot I'm so sorry"
        "-Im sorry"