Rekindled- Jake Kiszka

Chapter 21

"Cher, come on, dance with us. Quit working yourself so hard." I can hear my dad's voice say, watching as he puts the old record down and drops the needle onto it carefully. The voice of Etta James rings through the room, singing the sweet words to "At Last". 

"My love has come along," he sings along to the song, picking me up from where I'm standing with ease and making his way over to my mom, pulling her hand gently from her laptop, "my lonely days are over."

Her faint laughs echo as she gets up and joins us, looking between me and my father with love in her eyes. I look down to see my dad's arm holding me up, my body leaning against his chest. My dress is baby blue and flowy, and I can see the ends of two braids against my shoulders. My features look small from what I can see, like that of a child maybe 5 or 6 years old. I can feel the warmth of my dad's tanned skin as I cling to him, my mom soon joining as he pulls her in. We sway to the music, and I can feel buzzing against my skin as my dad hums along. The song seems to end too quickly as if part of it got skipped somehow. I pull my head from his chest and look up at him, his eyes matching the color of mine almost exactly. I feel him press a soft kiss to my forehead and let go of my mom. 

"I've got to put you down to fix it, my flower, I love you. He'll keep you safe," he says, causing me to furrow my eyebrows in confusion. He sounded so final in his words. What did he mean? 

"I love you, daddy," I say, feeling him lowering me to the ground until he suddenly loses his grip and drops me.

I wake up with a jolt, sitting up quickly and scanning my surroundings, trying to catch my breath. 

"MJ?" I hear Jake ask in a tired voice beside me. 

"No," I say breathlessly, "No, he was just here." 

"MJ, what's wrong? Who was here?" a confused Jake asks, sitting up and looking over at me. 

"I just had him, he was holding me, we were dancing, he was just here." I bring my hands to my face to rub my eyes, hoping to rid myself of the feelings I can't seem to shake. I notice the wetness on my cheeks, wiping it off and ripping the covers off of myself. 

"Baby, it was a dream, it's okay," Jake says in a softer tone, the realization finally kicking in as he rubs my back in soft circles. It had to be late, the room was still dark. 

I look over at him with tears welling in my eyes, threatening to spill over at any second. "I let him go again," I feel one of the threatening tears slide down my cheek. Jake's expression softens to one of sorrow and he pulls me into his chest, rubbing my back and laying us down, pulling the covers back over us. "I'm so sorry MJ," he mumbles as he presses a kiss to the top of my head, rubbing my back with one hand and using the other to run his fingers through my hair.

I don't remember falling back asleep, but when I wake up I feel exhausted. Drained physically and emotionally. I can tell that I had cried a lot last night, even if part of it was half-asleep. I feel Jake's hand start moving to rub my back again, telling me that he had already woken up, especially since I heard him shift to put his phone back on the nightstand. I turn my body and move up, burying my face into his neck and holding him as I feel his arms wrap around me, kissing my shoulder a few times to comfort me. 

"I'm sorry," I whisper in a raspy, tired voice.

"Don't apologize MJ. If you want to talk about it, I'd love to hear." 

I stay in his arms for a few more minutes, basking in the silence. But after a while I turn onto my back, laying my head on his chest that way and taking his hand in mine. I play with his rough fingers between mine and I can feel him looking down at me, watching quietly.