Back To Me

Chapter 22

Lucia's POV:

Driving at a fast and unpractical speed ahead to Thozi’s apartment, I gripped a tight hold just then onto the steering wheel. The anger still continuing to ripple through my ever since such a moment of finding out the truth behind Karim and Thozi, breaking my heart into many tiny little pieces. I honestly still cannot get my head around everything right now, to me it feel all like a nightmare going on instead of reality. But, due to the intense and horrible emotions as now which I am going through, I know this is nothing but real. For however long now, Karim has been seeing Thozi behind my back. Doing everything we used to do together, telling her how much she means to him, and all the rest. I am heartbroken to say at such the very least.

But with this whole situation I know I cannot only put the blame on Karim, Thozi has such of a big part to play in it as well. She knew Karim and I were together – yes ‘were’ being a main factor of it all now – yet she continued to go ahead with it all, knowing he was taking. And in my eyes that proves a lot about Thozi, it shows how she has no respect for other. I really am starting to wonder how she would like it if she was in my situation, how would she feel if the man she loved cheated on her with another woman? I doubt she would like it, she would be heartbroken, distraught, and wanting to find that woman. So like I said, she absolutely does not have any respect for me. For me as a friend, and, for me more importantly; as her boss.

And that is why I am going to her house now, to get the answers I need out of her. All of the reasons as to why she did it, if she even thought how I would feel when I found out, when it was they were planning to tell me about them both, and how it even came about? That is all I want to know, I want to know this all. I know for a simple fact that it will help the healing in a sense with it all, to help me get my head around things. What I need desperately now is all in a sense of closure with the situation, to know each little detail about it all, in order to help me move on with my own life. As far as I am concerned right now, I want nothing to do with either of them ever again. I will move out from Karim’s later on and Thozi will be sacked too.

This is the way things have to be now, there is no other way I can go about it. Never will I be able to forgive either of them for what they have done, being so manipulative and deceitful behind my back. Karim can apologise to me and deny it as much as he wants in order just to try and keep me with him but I cannot allow myself to do it. I mean, you know what they do say in a situation like this; once a cheat, always a cheat. And he has proved that to me all on this one occasion, he is nothing but a cheat. I know nothing about his past, who he was with and what happened in those relationships. But for all I know he may even have cheated just then as well, broken yet again another innocent woman’s heart, all by thinking with his cock.

Who knows when I will find the right person for me, it may come in months or even years at that. I do not know when. But what I do know is that I deserve better, I deserve for someone to treat me like a princess, nothing like the way Karim treated me. No woman ever deserves in the slightest to be cheated on, it lowers your self-esteem as I have just found out. Also, no woman deserves to feel this heartbroken. It is the worst feeling in the world and I would not at all even wish it on my worst enemy, as much as I may hate that once person not even in a sense would I want them to go through this pain. Not even Thozi deserves it, not even at all.

Anyway, soon enough, and I arrived outside of Thozi’s apartment. Sitting in my car in one of the parking spaces with my hands firmly on the steering wheel, taking a deep breath in, and then back out, for what I was about to go and do. In all honesty with you right now I did not know how I was going to go about this, what words would come out from my mouth, as just from thinking about the situation, I started to get angrier by the second. Knowing what I am like, I will probably go in there and start screaming and shouting at Thozi, wanting to get the answers I needed out of her. So closing my eyes I decided I would gain composure with all of the different emotions running wild inside me, knowing I would just explode when I see her.