Wolf #2: The Beast Within [COMPLETED]

Chapter 47

Chapter 47

What am I doing?

I mix the two potions together in the scrying bowl. To my pleasure, they light up in a green mixture the moment they mix together. I yip in delight and clap my hands. At least I'm not messing up entirely on this front.

The same cannot be said in regard to how I'm dealing with the personal feelings towards two certain men in my life. Again, I ask, what am I doing?

Quickly, I pop a couple of the crystals I have been using lately into the green potion. It's supposed to help cleanse crystals and other tools quicker than just placing them in the sunlight, moonlight, and running water.

Lying back on the wooden floor, I stare at the white, wooden paneling on the ceiling above. Today has been quiet and left me a lot of time to focus on practicing all that I had learnt from Mallory and Nancy.

It's also given me a lot of time to reflect on my own feelings. I still can't forget the way Rachel glared at me when she saw Adrian and I together in the hospital...and I can't get either Jace or Adrian out of my mind.

I'm happy Jace is here. It's given me the chance to set my emotions straight—it's given us an opportunity to see if we can actually make this work. And if Adrian wasn't in this situation (or in my mind all the time) then that might be enough. But now...now I'm questioning whether it's even worth giving Jace and I another chance.

Is it fair to him to think he has a chance against someone like Adrian?

My heart physically aches with the thought of hurting Jace. He hasn't been the greatest partner to me for a while now, but he was still there for me when my life blew up. He was the one who I leaned on after my sister's death and everyone thought I was a delusional conspiracy theorist. That had to count for something, surely?

But then there's Adrian...I don't even know if he's thinking along the same lines as me. He might like me, but it might not mean that he wants anything more than this—whatever this is. But I still can't get him out of my thoughts. It's hard to forget that he has been there for me since the beginning too. He has become my confident when Jace wouldn't listen. He's more than just a friend to me. He is perhaps the only person in my world right now that understands my pain...my need for vengeance.

I don't want to string Jace along but I'm not ready to let go of my lingering feelings for Adrian just yet.

"What a mess," I mutter to my sister. She only shrugs and continues to watch the potion bubble.

I had come a long way since reading Steph's journal about herbs. I can scry, perform cleansing rituals and practice basic medicine with the herbs and crystals. I'm far from being close to Nancy or Mallory's level, but I'm not doing terrible either. I can hold my own now and they often send me throughout the pack to tend to sick Wolves.

But for now, they are making me stay nearby. I'm still not entirely healed from the bear attack, and it'll be sometime before I can shift.

A knock on the front door interrupts my mithering. I pad down the hall and to the door. I'm surprised as all hell to find Mac standing on the other side.

"Hello," He grumbles. His gaze doesn't waiver nor does he shuffle, but I can sense that he feels awkward, "May I come in?"

"Huh, he doesn't just want to barge in like he usually does?" Steph hums while she sticks her finger through the steam of the mixture.

"Yes, of course," I step aside and let him in, "I'm surprised to see you, though. Is Kiana alright?"

"Aye, she's fine. I came to thank you, lass," He looks around the apartment with nostalgia. I can see memories dancing around the room as he does. The days that he, Adrian, Kiana, and Cynbel would spend drinking and sharing stories. The nights they would spend talking and plotting their escape from their Alpha's tyrannical rule. "How are you feeling?"