Song:
I spend all my free time trying to decipher what I really want
It should be simple but when I try to think of anything my mind goes blank
Easier said then done
There's a lot of options
But this orb we live in holds too many desires
What if I go for something I'm not even good at?
When if I'm good at something I don't even like?
Peoples opinions stay longer then they actually ever do
Imprinted on my brain
Repeating like a broken vinyl
Aimlessly destroying my hopes
They destroyed me to the point where I think I like it
It's the only thing that hasn't left
Failure, disappointment
No matter how many phases I go through or how much I change
It'll always be around the corner
Something no one can ever escape
Worse then death because you're still alive to feel the pain it's caused you
You're told you have to sit through it and feel it to heal
But when I've done that I feel nothing
Everybody's moved on and I'm stuck at the same position I started at
Feeling paralyzed and behind
The last one to finish a race
All eyes on me
I have all this energy and time
Yet nothing ever seems to get done
The numbers shrink
Then in a blink
Boom I'm 4 months from graduating
Still deciphering the troubles from my youth
Except I'm not young anymore I'm an adult
Stuck in this childish mindset waiting to grow
My feet glued to the ground
Told all I can do is wait.
