Check Yes or No | H.S.

Chapter 36

"Wait, so, hold on. Was that fire fake?"

"Oh no...That was real. But it sure helped raise the tension," he joked, "Everyone's fine though, don't worry."

"Good...So, where are we going?" I asked as Harry drove us into the city. But, we were going the opposite direction we should have been going. We seemed to be going back to the stadium, which made no sense.

"You'll see."

He took his hand out of mine and placed it on the wheel to aid in the turn he was making. And there it was before us, the massive stadium he had just sung to. He drove the car right into the stadium - seriously, it was cool. All the lights were off, though, but he still got out of the car with a smile on his face. His headlights were on and they cast a dim light on the ground before the car. The stage was all gone now. He held his hand out for me, and I admired it for a moment in it's beauty. He wore a ring and a classic, old fashioned watch with a brown leather band. Our fingers met with electricity and as we walked, he gradually walked closer and closer to me until we were standing in the middle of the stadium slow dancing to our very own heart beats. We didn't need to talk - or, rather, we didn't want to. Too often silence is considered awkward, but when it controls the right moment it is beautiful. We didn't need to talk because our bodies were talking for themselves. We were present. We were talking without words. I loved that. He loved that. We loved.

After a little bit, he took his phone out of his pocket. It illuminated our faces as he scrolled through his iTunes playlist. He clicked on a song titled, I hate you, don't leave me. Then he kept dancing, like nothing had changed, but it had because as the music played and the chorus hit, the stadium lit up in lights and I saw what we were standing in. The place had been decorated with bulb, string lights and trees, and white cloth and art all around. It was spectacular.

"What?" was all I could say.

"You used to always talk about wanting a prom like this. I wanted to give it to you."

"Why all of this, though? I mean, I know it's our anniversary of the note, but why? It's so much."

"Nothing is too much for you. I'd go to the moon and back to show you how much I love you."

"I'd like to see that," I joked. He laughed,

"I'm serious. I'm done hurting you. Like the song, I hate you, you hate me. I don't want to change that."

"Yeah, I can't handle another fall out either..."

"Jamie, I need to tell you something and you have to promise me something."

"What?"

"Not to laugh."

"Okay..."

He stopped dancing and held my hands in between our bodies. I watched as his lips prepared to speak, but hesitated for a moment, and how his eyes needed a moment to collect all the images it could in one moment. I watched him. I could have forever and been perfectly content.

"Jamie, I...I love you," he said confidently, "but I love you more than those three words could ever describe. And, I just, I want you to know that I will always love you."

He let go of one hand and reached in his pocket. I had that heart beat skip moment but brushed it off because, no this couldn't be a proposal. He would never. But, then he lowered himself to one knee and looked up at me as I once longed he would as a kid and he said it, he said the words that made me realize that life didn't have to be so empty or scary or lonely. He said the words that made me believe in a happy ending, when I knew deep down those never could exist.

"Jamie, I want to spend the rest of my life with you. And I know it's crazy, but we're crazy and crazy people are meant to be together, you've known that longer than I have. Please, Jamie, will you marry me?"

I broke my first promise. I laughed. Not out of hysterics but because I was so blindsided I just had to unleash some emotion. It was funny. It was funny that we met and that we were hear now. Life was funny and I wanted to laugh, but I regretted it the moment I did because his face dropped.

"Forget I said anything," he stood up ashamed.

"No, no, baby I didn't mean it like that."

"It's okay. Maybe I moved too fast."

"Sure, you moved fast but I get it and, you know, I sure would hope that you wouldn't give up this easily? Is this something you really want?" I questioned suddenly afraid he was just doing something for, I don't know, publicity.

"Who do you think I am? I'd never ask something like that and not mean it! Yes, I want to marry you and wake up with you and fall asleep with you and dream with you. I want you, forever and always but I will wait. I won't ever stop fighting for you. I'll just choose my timing better next time. Wait a while."

"Now why would you do that?"

He stumbled for words. Cause you laughed, I'm sure he was thinking.

"Harry," I rested my arms on his, "I love you. And this is terrifying and could be the wrong move but...Yes, yes I want to marry you."

"Really?" He looked into my eyes like a puppy with watery eyes.

"Yes." I kissed him. And he kissed me, his mouth drifting to my neck and chest with exhilarated passion. I stripped off his shirt and he mine before we lay down on the ground that was covered with a blanket and fell in love, all over again. With my hands in his hair and my soul given up for him, I felt nothing but freedom. I had found what I always wanted. I had found him.

Everything eventually found its way off, like naturally it should. When you love someone, there are no secrets. One scar becomes both your scars. Though I felt strange sharing myself with Harry in the middle of a historic stadium, it felt right because after everything we'd been through, we weren't supposed to have a normal life. If we were, we'd never have met.

"I've never known someone so beautiful. You're just everything, Jamie." Harry lay next to me hours later, when bliss and rest were setting in. His body was sweaty and his hair was brushed out of his face so I could see his eyes, with all their mysterious color.

"I don't know if I believe that."

"I'm not going to stop until you do." Harry grabbed my waist and rolled on top of me. I laughed with joy and clung on to him. Life was good. My heart felt full for once.