❤Struggles, Sentiments, Yearning❤

Chapter 14 - He Called Me 'LOU' ❤

Louis' POV

'Lou'..

I know it's my name, I have heard it many times since we separated, from many people, even Eleanor.. But Harry calling me Lou is something totally different, it gives me a rush, a chill down my spine, a feeling indescribable..

I don't understand whether to actually thank God for this medical issue, 'cause finally after so many days, I was the same with him, the way we used to be, 'together' or curse him, for I don't have much time left..

I was lying there, completely motionless, when Harry came in and we had a little talk.. He said he would wait, wait forever for me, but little does he know that his forever was going to end soon, that I would be soon gone..

I could feel a teardrop trickle down the side of my eye, down my cheek... I crushed the bedsheet with my fist, I wanted to scream out loud, cry.. But of all, tell Harry everything, that's eating me up, my desires, my Wishes, the ones only he can fulfill..

Right from the moment when I regained my consciousness, till now, I have seen him stand right outside the door, watching me through the glass..

His dedication is something that makes me guilty, makes me sad, that I can't scream out my love to him..

How can I just pull him closer, just to let myself disappear? He would be devastated..

I saw Harry quarreling back out there, I couldn't actually make out the reason.. But I saw Eleanor there too, and I didn't have to think how furious Harry would be..

"How are you feeling now, Louis?", the doctor asked me while examining me.

"I feel fine now.. When can I go home?", I asked the doctor..

"Before that, I need to talk to you, Louis.. I hope you know about your medical issues.. Your heart is becoming weak, Louis, day by day.. You need to stop this.. And get as much of rest as possible.. If you want, I can talk to your Mom, even the management", the doctor said rubbing my shoulder..

"Please, doctor.. Let me do this myself.. But as of now, I want to get out of this hospital as soon as possible", I pleaded to him.

"Okay, I'll see what I can do.. Maybe discharge You tomorrow", he went outside saying this..

I could sense that the doctor had went outside to tell everyone about my discharge tomorrow, Harry's face told it all.. The smile, those sparkle in the green eyes.. I could feel them and then he slammed open the door and ran towards me..

"We are going home tomorrow, Lou.. I am so happy.. I'll go over to our house and clean everything up, afterall, you need a clean place.. ", Harry said hugging me.

Just as he was about to leave the room, I held his hands, and he turned back..

"Do you need anything, Lou?", he asked me.

"Sit down for a bit, will you? I need to talk to you", I told him..

I made him sit right beside, 'cause i knew he won't be strong enough to accept the thing I was just about to say to him..

"Things have not been the same, Harry"

"You are still confu--", I cut him out before he could complete..

"Let me speak, Hazza.. I know you have Loved me, all through this time, even when I went out giving you an excuse that was completely lame and stupid.. You loved me then, you love me still.. I know that, Hazzabear.. I wasn't strong enough to tell you something, make you go through something that would tear you up.. I am dying, Hazza.. I don't have much time left..
The day I told you those things, was the day I came to know about my medical dysfunction.. Congestive Heart Disease is what the doctor says.. Although it is not a disease that takes away someone's life, but for some reasons, my condition has been deteriorating day after day.. The paramedics don't seem to have any effect on me.. I couldn't see you go through this, so I lied that night.. I have lied all this time, about everything.. I don't want to die, Hazza.. Please make me stay", I cried out to him, holding his hands as strongly as I could..

I could see him fumble, he was going pale.. I shook him vigorously and made him come back to his senses..

"Harry... HARRY.. ", i screamed out to him..

"This can't be true.. Stop lying, Lou.. I'll go away forever if you want to, but don't say something like that.. You know I can't bear a small scratch on you and you are talking about dying?", he said weeping, holding me even tighter..

"I am not lying, Hazza.. This is the truth I have been hiding from you.. You'll have to accept all of it.. I know you'll become strong, you have to.. For me.. I want to spend the rest of it, all that's left, with you by my side, Harry", I said wrapping him around my arms..

He just simply rested his head on my chest, curled up by my side, the way he always does.. His curls falling on my face,and cried relentlessly, just like he hasn't cried in so long.. He kept cursing every single thing around him, until he became tired, tired of everything that caught his eyes, and fell asleep on my arms..

I kissed him and tucked him right beside me..

"I Love You, Harry.. With all my life.. I Love You", I said only to find him asleep, on my chest..