❤Struggles, Sentiments, Yearning❤

Chapter 19- IMAGINATIONS..

Louis' POV

I suddenly wake up to find myself in a whitewashed room, beeping sound all around, the room smelling like that of medicines, a canula inserted in my nostrils and little time did it take me to realise that I landed up in a cranky old hospital..

A sudden thought left me perplexed, I was totally confused and couldn't make out what to say..

I intentionally looked out at the door of the room.. Harry stood there, motionless, stiffly in a single place..

"Am I still in that hospital bed, that day when I got admitted just 'cause I fainted.. Did I not wake up since then? Have I been lying here just like this the whole time? Then what about all the time I spent with Hazza?", I thought to myself..

I startled up in confusion but the headache again pulled me back to the pillow..

Seeing me struggle, Harry rushed in to the room and held me..

"What happened, Lou? Is it anything that's giving you pain, or anything else.. Tell me if you need the doctor.. LOU.. lou.. ", He screamed out to me in concern..

"How long have I been here?", I asked him..

"Not long", he said somehow trying to suppress the talk..

"Hazza? How long?", I asked again..

"More than a month now, Boo.. But that doesn't matter anymore now that You are back.. I missed you so much..",he said wrapping his arms around me..

I was left in a total state of awe.. I couldn't believe what Harry said.. Over a month? Really? But how can it be possible, I was with Harry the whole time, after I got discharged.. We reconciled, our love was back.. We were back together.. Then, how come he is saying all this?

"But, how can this be possible? You are joking, right? Please tell me you are?", I pleaded to him..

"But Boo, why would i joke on something so serious like this.. You know how happy I would have been if what I said was a lie but unfortunately it's not", Harry said back..

"What about all those beautiful moments, our moments? What about the time I went back to our house, like us being together again.. Those long passionate kisses, those pancakes.. The cuddles, the sleeps together.. The days i spent with you, Hazza? What about those? And my w-wi...!", I just said utterly distraught..

"What are talking about, Lou? None of these happened since You left me, since that night.. But yes Lou, we have been together since the night you were admitted here, for I haven't left you since then.. I only go back home once a day, just to shower up and put on fresh clothes, and the rest of my day has always been with you.. There has been several times throughout this time when I kissed you but you couldn't feel, when I cried upon your chest but your hands didn't run through my curls to comfort me.. I felt so lonely.. I felt so afraid.. I missed you so much, Lou.. ", he said crying relentlessly..

Meanwhile, the boys and Mum and Paul entered the room.. Mum gave me a smile, breathed a sigh of relief and sat beside me.. She didn't say a word, just stared at my face the whole time..

But at last she spoke..

"I love you, honey.. Don't leave us again.. ", were her words..

Leave? But I thought I was here the whole time.. Why is everyone saying like that?

I gave the best possible nod I could, and turned back to look Harry still weeping.. I ran my hands down his cheek wiping off the tears and promising him to not leave him again ever..

"Please, go outside all of you, I need to examine him", the doctor said..

I knew that the doctor would be able to answer the delusions my mind was creating..

"Everyone's saying that I have been here over a month now?", I asked him

"Yes, you have been.. Due to your heart growing weaker, the percentage of oxygen reaching your brain declined abruptly, rupturing a part of your cortex.. You were thus unconscious the whole while.. Your mind was alert but your motor functions didn't work properly", the doctor said.

"I'll have to get a CT-scan n MRI dobe to check how the medicines have worked.. ", he said again..

"Yeah, okay", I said while I was taken to the pathological unit of the hospital..

After all the tests were done and I was again shifted to the ward, I couldn't believe at what my ears listened and my eyes saw..

I couldn't believe that all this while it was all the imaginations of my subconscious mind, nothing of which was true.. Not even a single moment..

Harry was in so much pain this whole time, I could just see from how he has become, the freckles on his face, the worn out figure, unmanaged hair.. And alk I did was just imagine things, that too unconsciously?

But what about all the wishes I thought? Yes, they were true, i have written about them myself in the diary.. Harry hasn't seen them..

It was all you, Lou.. All this while.. All of your imaginations.. But it's one thing that my imagination saw true was that Harry loves me, be it in my imaginations, be it in front of the unconscious me..

And all of this meant, that Harry knowing about my wishes and fulfilling then isn't true, that Lucas, our baby boy, was my imagination..
That my wishes, which I want aren't going to to fulfilled 'cause Harry doesn't even know about them, he is not even aware.. It was all my imaginations..

The things I wanted from the day i separated from Hazzabear are the things my Imagination saw, unconsciously..