The Last Chance Book 2

Chapter 6

TW: Mentions of blood and injuries

After getting his hands bandaged Zee pulls him towards the office. " I don't want to do this Hia. I don't want to be in the same room as my father right now " he says angrily. " And you won't. The meeting should be over by now. They are all probably wondering where you are " Zee says. After complaining for a little while longer he gives up and lets Zee take him to the office. Once they get there Zee has him sit down on a chair inside the front office. " Stay here. I'm going to tell the others that I found you " Zee says before walking into the room. Around 10 minutes later Zee and the rest of their friend group come out of the room. He just watches them as they walk over to him. He can see the worry in Nat's eyes. He can see how Nat is trying not to look down at his hands. " They don't hurt Nat " he says trying to make his voice sound calm. Nat looks up and they make eye contact. Shortly after Nat looks away. He can see Nat start to cry so he stands up and slowly walks over to him. He then pulls Nat into a hug. He can feel himself getting angry at how he's now made Nat cry. " I'm sorry for making you cry. I will get better soon. I'm probably just acting like this because of the stress
and ptsd " he says quietly trying to reassure him. " It's lunch time. Why don't we all go and eat in the cafeteria " Zee says and everyone agrees. He pulls away from the hug. " Can I hold ". He doesn't let Nat finish his sentence. He already knows what he wants to ask. So he grabs Nat's hand " Of course you can hold my hand Nat. Thank you for asking ". Nat gives him a small smile. He feels a little relieved to see that he's helped calm Nat down.
Everyone grabs their lunch before heading over to their usual table. Everyone in the cafeteria seems to be looking at them. More specifically they're all looking at him. He try's to ignore it by going on his phone. When he opens instagram he sees a Message request from a familiar name. Noah, his childhood friend and his first crush. The one who started everything. He can feel his anger rising. " Hey NuNew, I'm sorry for what's happened to you ". He rolls his eyes and sends a message back saying " That's all you say after everything. You are the cause of everything that's happened to me. You are the one who told everyone my sexuality. Because of that I was almost killed by Nate and his friends. Because of that my friend got beat up and the other one got stabbed ". When the message is sent he gets a reply almost instantly.
" I didn't know something like this would happen NuNew ".
" What the fuck did you expect to happen Noah! You told everyone at a very homophobic school that I was gay ".
" I just wanted it to play off as a joke ".
" A joke!? Me getting bullied is a joke to you ".
" Look I'm sorry just fucking forgive me already ".
" I won't forgive you or accept your apology ".
" Fuck you NuNew. You deserved it ".
He slams his phone down on the table. Scaring everyone. " I'm going for a walk. I need to cool down. No one follow me ". He says the last part looking at Zee. " That depends are going to hurt yourself again ". He stands up angrily. " Hia. I'm really pissed off right now can you not say shit like that " he says loudly. " I made a promise to keep you safe. Even when it's keeping you safe from yourself " Zee says sounding a little angry. " Great. Now not only my childhood crush pissed at me. My boyfriend is now pissed as well ". He gets up walking away. Completely forgetting his phone. He hears someone run after him so he turns around. When he does he sees Nat with a sandwich and his phone. " At least eat something. Please take your phone as well in case something happens " Nat says in a whisper sounding afraid. He goes to take them from Nat when he sees Nat flinch. He stops immediately. " A-are you afraid of me " he asked scared. His anger immediately disappearing. " No I'm not ". Nat goes to step forward but he takes a step back. He looks up to see the rest of his friends watching him and Nat. " I-I'm becoming just like him. I'm scaring you. I need to get out of here quickly " he whispers before grabbing his phone from Nat and running off. He runs out of the school and over to the dorm rooms. He quickly heads to his and Nat's room. When he gets inside he sits down on his bed. Leaning against the wall and trying to calm himself down. He doesn't know if he should be angry or scared that he's made Nat afraid of him. He begins to cry. He's starting to feel sad again. Is that good or bad, he doesn't know. He opens his phone and goes to his photos. He clicks on on a photo of him with everyone else. They're all wearing the matching hoodies they got. They all look happy. He wishes he can go back to that moment before everything went to hell.
He hears a knock on the door and immediately looks towards the door. " NuNew are you in there. It's Zee. Can you please talk to me ". He try's to stay silent. Praying that Zee will go away. However Zee opens the door. When Zee walks in he makes eye contact with him. He scoots away towards the corner in the wall. They don't break eye contact and he hates it. He can't look away from him. He can see the hurt in Zee's eyes. When they do break eye contact it's because Zee goes to the door and closes it. He then turns back around and makes eye contact again. Zee then slowly goes to the other side of the room and sits down on Nat's bed. Zee doesn't say anything. They just keep looking at each other. He so desperately wants to run over to him and hug him. To feel safe but he can't trust himself right now. He's made Nat scared of him. He's even become scared of himself.
Eventually he breaks and starts to cry. He looks away from Zee. He curls himself up into a ball. Just wanting to be anywhere but there in that moment. He hears Zee get up and slowly walk over to him. When he feels the bed dip next to him he looks up. Zee then pulls him into his chest. He tries to get away but Zee is just to strong. " Hia's here. It's ok. You don't have to be scared. I've got you. It's ok ". Slowly he stops trying to get away.he leans into Zee's chest and just cries while Zee keeps trying to reassure him that he's going to be ok. When he's calmed down he quietly says " I hate the way I'm feeling. I can't control my emotions. They keep switching so fast. I was rude to you and everyone. Worst of all I made Nat afraid of me. I made the first person to be kind to me scared. What do I do Hia. I'm ruining everything. I can't stop myself. I'm scared of myself and that I might push everyone away like my father said I'm doing ". Zee gently makes him turn and look at him. Zee then wipes away the dry tears from his face. In the most gentle voice he has herd Zee use he says " I don't have the answers to help you. But what I do know is that your ptsd is making you act like this. It is not your fault that you are reacting like this. This is a normal thing that happens when people have ptsd. I also know that Nat is not afraid of you. When you ran off he turned around and told us what you had said and how you reacted. He was so heartbroken to make you think that. Even more heartbroken to hear you say that you're becoming like him. Because you are not ". He stays quiet for a while before saying " How can you be so sure that I'm not becoming like him ". Zee leans down and kisses his forehead before saying " Because you are the kindest person I have ever met. No matter how angry you are you never hurt anyone. You only act mean because you don't know how to feel with all of your thoughts and emotions. That alone proves that you are nothing like him or anyone in that group of people ". Before he could say anything he hears the door open.

Word Count: 1499