Behind the Engineer's Glasses (Completed)

Kabanata 38

Truth

The girl cried in my brother's arms while my brother is just staring blankly. 

"S-Sandro...." ang nanghihinang boses niya.

Who is this girl? she looks so young... So much younger than us.

Inalalayan ako ni Freyr at medyo napa atrs kami pareho.

Bumaling sa amin si kuya, "Can you leave us for a moment?" he asked.

Ang mga mata niya ay may bahid ng dilim, he looks mad. Ngunit ng bumaling siya sa babaeng  nakayakap sa kanya ay nawala iyon at napalitan ng lambot, dahan-dahan din niyang ginantihan ng yakap ang babae gamit ang isa niyang braso.

"Alright..." saad ko at binalingan si Freyr, agad siyang tumango sa akin at ginaya ako palabas ng kwarto ni kuya.

Nang makalabas kami ay kapwa kami walang imik. Tahimik siyang naka sunnod sa akin.

He followed me quietly while I make my way to the chapel. Tahimik akong naupo doon at tumabi naman sa akin si Freyr.

Lumuhod ako para magdasal. For years I've been longing and praying for justice. I've been praying for my brothers soul. But then, God gave me another chance to be with my brother again. God gave us a chance to be with him again... With the help of Freyr.

Nagalit ako sa kanya dahil anak siya ng kalaguyo ni Daddy... I left him without hearing his explanation, I hurted him... Because I'm trying to justify that I am hurt too... That I thought leaving him and hurting him would ease the pain in my heart.

But I am wrong... Mas nadagdagan ang sakit nung sinaktan ko siya... Mas nahirapan akong makalimot nung iniwan ko siya.

Because I love him... I love him so much... At noong nalaman ko ang totoo ay parang winasak ako. Hindi ko matanggap na siya pa. Na kahit ang kasanalang hindi naman niya ginawa ay sinisi ko sa kanya.

At sa nagdaang taon patuloy ko siyang minahal. May poot at galit noong una... Of course I was betrayed... But Kahit may sakit mas nananaig ang pagmamahal ko sa kanya.

I push myself to work, I left the country to forget him. Ngunit araw-araw lamang siyang pinapaalala sa akin.

Ang hirap piliting kalimutan ng taong ayaw kalimutan ng puso mo.

Matapos magdasal ay dahan-dahan akong umupo, Freyr is just quietly sitting beside me.

"You already know that it's my brother right?" Tanong ko sa kanya.

He doesn't seem to be shocked nang makita niya ang kapatid ko kanina... I think he already knows that my brother is alive.

"Yeah..." Mahinang saad niya, he looks like he was hesitant to answer my question.

Probably because he thinks that I will get mad at him again.

"But... I only lied because your brother has an amnesia... At sa tingin ko, baka mabigla siya kapag nakita ka niya..." He said softly, para bang nag iingat at takot na may masabi siyang hindi ko magustuhan.

I looked at him, he looks so mature now... He looks more confident unlike the innocent Freyr of the past. Matiim siyang nakatingin sa akin, ang paraan niya ng pagtingin sa akin ay maingat... Na para bang isa akong babasaging bagay.

I bit my tongue, I miss him so much... Pinigilan ko ang aking sarili na sabihin iyon.

I wanna hug him so bad... I want to tell him that I am sorry, that I didn't mean those words. That I didn't stop loving him.