anxiously attached to you, i fear that you'll leave me, although you've given me no reason to believe that. as the current subject of my incessant obsession i count the seconds until i see you. and whether this is love, i'm not sure, but i know that i'm happy with you, and happy to hear your voice—that's enough for me. it's honest to say i need you more than you need me. i always told myself i was too crazy to get into another relationship, that honestly i required too much attention for it to be feasible. i never want to think of myself that way again. the truth is i've never been crazy, and i need to keep reminding myself of that.
any idiot with an ounce of psychological knowledge can easily explain my anxious attachment with my lack of father figure stability as a child. once again, the daddy issues trope has affected my ability to trust and feel loved.
"We would go days without having a meaningful conversation and I used to miss you so much when that happened but it never seemed like you missed me". the first time i heard this i couldn't help but falsely relate. but, we pass the hours meaningfully conversating until our lungs are tired and our throats are raw. but i still miss you, and i still can't help but think you'll tire of me, that you'll find someone new. someday i hope to learn to love, without a self-imposed expiration date.
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the night the stars fell - poetry collection
PoetryPLEASE READ THE CONTENT WARNINGS this poetry collection includes themes and descriptions of: sexual violence/assault/harassment PTSD hallucinations depression anxiety self harm disordered eating in my experience feeling seen through works of writ...
