Different Shades of Pink and Green/ matchablossom 🍵🌸

Goodbye.

TRIGGER WARNING: THIS CHAPTER WILL CONTAIN SENSITIVE AND TRIGERRING CONTENTS SUCH AS SUICIDAL THOUGHTS AND SUICIADAL ATTEMPT. Please be aware of the risk of reading this chapter. Remember that you come first and that your mental health is more important!

With nothing in my mind,
I look at myself:
Emptiness.
I wish I had more time
But this is goodbye.

Cherry's pov:

I placed the letter on my desk. It was night and a little cold. I kept contemplating the lamp beside me, thinking of Ko and what he would do once he read the letter...

I am such a bad person.
He shouldn't even be my friend.
But I fell in love with him
It was out of my control...
He is too good for me.

"I am sorry Ko" I whispered, hoping that my words would at least reach him. I was trapped in an endless black void. It was scary, empty and lonely. Hope was long gone.

I thought many times about confessing to Kojiro but that would lead me to more pain... 'what if he rejects me? what if he leaves me?'. I was not ready to lose him for something I could prevent. That was why I stayed quiet if you asked me.

I stood up from my chair and looked around my room one last time. I scanned every detail, trying to memorize every object: my bed, my books, my pens, my clothes, my skateboard... the pictures of Ko and me. I laughed at the idea of how I would never get the chance to graduate from high school. All the tiny memories shared in this room will forever be in my heart, now and forever. The comfort in how it smelled... the tears and the laughter will forever be heard.

I am sorry mom... for always disappointing you but that's all I ever done.

I took one last breath and headed to my bathroom that was connected to my bedroom. I entered and sat in the bathtub. It was the perfect size: not too big and not too narrow. Just enough to fit a soulless person. The perfect coffin.

I started the water. I made sure that my last bath would be warm and relaxing. In my hand I held the weapon: small yet extremely harmful. I found it funny how my hand was trembling when I wanted it ...

I closed my eyes and stayed frozen in place for a little... because I had to say one last thing. To you.

Dear readers,

I probably made you cry. I probably made you angry. I probably disappointed you all... no. I am sure I disappointed you all. You might think my worries are stupid. But to me they are humongous and that is how it is.

Anyway, I won't bore you with the obvious, but I wanted to say one last thing.

You might know him more than me. You definitely do. You heard his words... Kojiro's words. You might even know him better than I will ever do. I am fine with that... as long he is happy.

You been with us long enough to know our stories...

So, may I take some of your time to ask you a few questions... at least before I go.

- First, what is your name? your age?

My name is Kaoru Sakurayashiki and I am 18.

- Do you study? Do you work?

It is supposed to be my last year of high school.

- What are your dreams? Hope?

I used to dream of doing art and hope... well I have none right now. Sorry.

- Do you have siblings? What is your favorite color?