My Guardian Angel (Liam Payne fanfiction) [UNDER EDITING]

Chapter 15

Chapter 15

I lay on my bed, staring at the wall. I never slept the whole day or night. My parents had come around two, only to find me faking sleep. Before I knew it dawn had approached and I realized I didn't want to wait around. Pulling on sweatpants, a t-shirt, and some Vans, I grabbed my phone and walked out the front door.

I had already made up my mind that under no circumstances was I going to school today. Mom and Dad would assume I had left for school early for a meeting maybe. I stuffed my hands into my hoodie pockets and opened the front door softly into the cool October morning.

The sun was barely above the horizon when I began walking down the street. The street was completely deserted. The wind whipped my hair into my face even though it was tucked under my hood.

By seven that morning, I was sitting on a park bench staring into the grass. Every once in a while a buisness man or woman came walking by, occassionally with a small child. Everyone was at school or work now, so by eight thirty the park was deserted also.

I wondered why exactly I decided to do this. I had never ditched school before. Being what I considered a bad girl or rebel wasn't really my thing. Even though I'd had sex a dozen or more times didn't make me one either, simply because they were not my choice. Was that classified as rape?

I got hungry a little while later and walked to a small bakery near the park, buying a huge chocolate chip muffin and a coffee. Sitting down at a booth, I stared out the window. I saw the owner of the bakery watching me nervously. If she got the courage, I was completely expecting her to ask why I wasn't in school. I probably looked like a hoodlum.

Someone cleared their throat beside my table. I glanced up. Liam was standing there, all near six feet of glory and perfection towering over me. "Shouldn't you be in school?" I asked warily as Liam slid into the booth across from me, his big hands wrapped around a white coffee cup like mine. "I was going to ask you the same thing." he said quizically, his eyebrow raised.

I lowered my hood and showed him the bruise on my neck, and the few on my arms. His face hardened, and his expression looked murderous. "I knew I should have followed you." he said, his voice dark. I shook my head. "There's just some things we can't solve." I said quietly. Depression was slowly creeping over me like a shadow, and even being with Liam wasn't making me happy like normal.

"You don't understand Ch-" Liam began, his voice pleading. I inturrupted, "No, Liam, you don't understand." I sounded miserable and unhappy. Everything was becoming too much. I didn't want to be abused. I didn't want to get myself and Liam hurt. I didn't want anything.

I felt tears welling up in my eyes. Liam reached across the table, carressing my face with one of his hands. "Please, please don't cry." he whispered, also looking on the verge of tears. His touch made my skin feel warm, but the feeling didn't delight me. I knew I was in love, to state the least. But I also knew this wasn't good.

I got up from the booth and walked out of the bakery, stuffing my sleeve into my mouth to muffle my cries. I heard the shop door open again and Liam exit, but he didn't follow me. I ran through the park and back to my house, through the quiet sleeps, into my quiet house, and up the stairs to my quiet bedroom.

I didn't know what exactly made me want to do this. Perhaps nearly dying last night. Perhaps knowing I would die either way. Or maybe because I was too deep with Liam to turn around without both of us getting hurt. I felt myself gasp for breath. There was only one thing to do.

I sat on my bed for a few minutes, clutching the sides to keep myself steady. My head felt like it was going to explode, and everything was blurry from the tears burning in my eyes. Did I really want to go this route? Did I? My body and mind screamed yes. Without waiting for me to change my mind, I got up and ran to the bathroom.

The first thing I did was fill a glass with water, and I took out the tylenol out of the cabinet. There was a warning label on the back reading that too many in a short period of time could kill you. Perfect. I yanked the bottles top off and shook at least forty into my hands.

My hands were shaking horribly. I had to do it. Sure, it'd hurt everyone for a little while, but they'd move on. They'd all find new loves and grow old with them. They didn't need me. I was less important than their lives. I couldn't take hurting them anymore.

"Please, God, just let it end!" I screamed into the silence, my voice cracking a fresh wave of depression fell over me. I stared at my shaking hand and the pills in them. I couldn't turn back now. I couldn't.

I took the pills a few at a time. By the time twenty had gone down my throat, I could already feel myself spinning. They were going through my blood, the tylenol was killing me. I took the last one and set the glass down. There was definitly no going back now.

My last glimpse of real life was a wet shower curtain. A bathroom counter with an assorted number of pills spread out on them. A pile of dirty clothes from the day before in a heap on the bathroom floor. And lastly, a small picture of Liam and I had hung up on my mirror, us both smiling.

I felt myself begin to fall. Then, I lay on the floor, feeling my heart stop. Feeling my life slipping away as though it was a rain drop on the wind shield, being wiped away by the wiper. Disappearing. I heard the front door open barely, my hearing seeming impaired. It was different. Calming somewhat.

"Christina?" a male voice called out. I couldn't have replied if I tried. I heard my breathing slowing down. "Christina, I know you're here!' the voice called out again. No, I wasn't there. I was slipping away. I couldn't speak, I couldn't even breathe hardly.

My death was inturrupted by the voice screaming, "CHRISTINA!' My eyes were drooping shut. I felt peaceful. I was leaving. Leaving all the pain and misery, but also all the happiness I had left behind, only for Liam to remember.