the 1

19

3 years. Three years has passed for Jinsoul and still, she couldn't help but feel a wave of anguish was over her at times. It has been hard enough to leave and it has been harder to stop contacting her mother.

She has lived a great life in Amsterdam, being the local news anchor for daily reports has been keeping her smile for the past three years. She had big achievements and even a new environment to live in but she still does ache.

New York was her life, her passion.

There was never a day that Jinsoul would've thought to leave it all behind, she never thought she'd be able to leave her comfort place and live in Amsterdam yet here she is now, in her terrace, sipping a cup of coffee while admiring the view.

Even though Jinsoul has been happier with everything that's happening to her now, a sense of loneliness still settles deep down within her. She missed everything New York gave her, she missed everything she had done there but she had no plans of coming back anymore. She had no plans of turning her back to Amsterdam, this is where she lives now.

Yet,

What would've happened if she just chose to stay?

A loud ringtone blared across her entire terrace which made Jinsoul blast out strong curse. "Fucking hell," she muttered before placing her mug on the coffee and letting her phone occupy both of her hands.

It was a call, "Why are you calling me so early?" She heard the other line let out a laugh while Jinsoul could only roll her eyes. "Is it wrong to miss you, Jinsoul?"

"Go to hell, Hyejoo."

Hyejoo laughed once again before calming herself down. "Just wanted to check up on you that's all, it's been a while since we last talked."

When her application for this job was approved, Sooyoung and Hyejoo were the first to know about it. All of them had one reaction that time and it was fuelled anger. Jinsoul had plans of leaving New York yet she didn't even talk to them. If Sooyoung didn't see Jinsoul outside Chaewon's birthday that night along with her trembling lips then Jinsoul wouldn't have spilled the beans on leaving.

Sooyoung was very upset with her while Hyejoo avoided the two of them. Jinsoul's life during that time was in absolute ruckus, she couldn't afford leaving all of them yet this was an opportunity that only comes once, she couldn't let it slip right?

She expected the two to banish her in hell, forget she ever existed and never to talk to her again but they surprise her when they came in running through the airport, eyes crying out.

On that Wednesday morning was when Jinsoul knew that there'd be only one person she would hurt with her decision of leaving without saying any goodbye.

She wanted to ran away from the airport and go to her yet she knows to herself she'd only be a damn fool if she thinks she'll still go back in her arms even after she's put her through.

She has hurt her enough and maybe staying away is what's best for the both of them. A silent sigh passed out of Jinsoul's close lips as she slowly starts massaging her temple.

"Hyejoo, don't be so dramatic, we just talked a week ago. I'm alright, how about you and Sooyoung? How are you guys?" Jinsoul asks while she pulls at her seat and occupies it while writing her report for tonight.

"Jinsoul, you always ruin the fun." Jinsoul could tell that at this moment, Hyejoo was rolling her eyes at her. That thought made her cackle a little. "Sooyoung's fine. Still gay as ever and she's been going steady with Jiwoo. Speaking of Jiwoo, that girl still hates you."

Her hair that was now dyed into a light hue of blonde competed with the sun's rays when she stood up, pacing back and forth. It has nearly been three years yet she knows that no forgiveness will ever be valid for everything she's put Jungeun through.