Avoiding me

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POV Adrien:

I understand that she is avoiding me, even if all what I did was putting my hand on her shoulder. It wasn't a bad intention, I'm her husband and not someone else but she is right, what happened to her isn't that easy.

I let her walk and laid her on bed then I covered her. I got my pillow and my cover going toward the couch but a hand stropped me by grabbing my wrist

Marinette: where are you going? Sleep by me

Adrien: I'm afraid to touch you while sleeping. Just take all the bed, I'm here in the same room.

Marinette: I'm scared, I need you with me, please Adrien.

I take a look at her bluebell eyes, and I found them wet with her tears. I put my pillow back and I gave her some tissues to wipe her tears. I laid on my side facing the door and I closed my eyes, pretending to be sleeping

POV Marinette:

I feel unfair with Adrien, he is my husband and he should touch me and the only allowed to touch me but I can't. something in me is avoiding every physical contacted. I got ripped my clothes and rapped in front of him without any pity, I'm lucky that I can stand on my feet.

I convinced him to sleep with me in the same bed. He turned to the opposite side and fall asleep. I raised my knees to my chest and rested my arms on my knees, then 2 Kwamis appeared in front of me

Tikki: Mari, what are you doing with him?

Marinette: M...Me? nothing, why?

Plagg: you are avoiding him, avoiding any touch of him

Marinette: I know, I'm not ready yet

Tikki: he is your husband, and now you both should move on

Plagg: also, don't forget he is the most hurted and in pain, watching his wife touched by someone else isn't that easy, it's painful. I can't feel Adrien, he is ripped inside

Marinette: I'm in pain too, you know what happened to me

Tikki: we aren't talking about that Mari; you should move on and don't let Adrien pay for this craps. You should make him forget, but avoiding him won't help at all

Plagg: it will just make it worst. Look at him, this is your husband, your Adrien, your kitty

I got my hand closer to his hair but I couldn't touch him, I'm not ready at all.

Marinette: I'm sorry, I'm not ready at all

Tikki (while she sighed): fine sleep now

I nodded to both Kwamis, then I just covered myself and turned to face Adrien, but I forgot that I'm facing his back. I felt him moving then he stand up and started walking through the door

Marinette: where are you going?

Adrien: to the kitchen

Without adding a word, he left. I got my robe, I wore it and left going to the kitchen. I heard Adrien talking with Plagg so I didn't go in, but I kept hearing from outside

Plagg: why you are so cold with Marinette, kid?

Adrien: I'm not cold, you know how much I love her but...

Plagg: but you don't want to do anything with her, this mean no touching, afraid that she avoids you again?

Adrien: she will avoid me, I'm ready for that, also I understand her, I'm not blaming her. I just want to stay alone please

Plagg: fine, I will stay quiet

I didn't know that I'm hurting him more and more, but it's unvoluntary, something in me won't accept any touch from any man right now, even Adrien himself.

I went to the bathroom, and pulls off all my clothes. I turned on the shower and I let the hot water on my head

I heard the door opened, so I turned around to find Adrien coming in

Adrien: I'm sorry, I just come to brush my teeth. Ill go to another bathroom.

He was about to leave but I stopped him, I should try why not

Marinette: don't go, join me

Adrien: join you where?

Marinette: here. Pulls off your clothes and join me

Adrien: it's a bad idea

Marinette: I insist

He nodded and he removed all his clothes except his boxer and he joined me

Marinette: I said all

Adrien: this is better Mari

I look into his eyes, it's not the same look I always get. This look is full of sadness and guilt. It wasn't his mistake; he couldn't do anything and I know that

Each one of us is taking a shower by himself. Usually, we put the gel to each other and rub it everywhere, but this time, I feel really lonely. He turned around to face me, so I got my hands closer to touch him but I couldn't, it's like something is blocking me, so I get out, I put a towel and left the bathroom. I laid my back on the bathroom's door, and I heard a yelling from Adrien saying "fuck" very loud and then I heard a hitting sound, I bet he hit the wall with his both hands. I feel really guilty at this point, if my own husband is not allowed to touch me, then the problem come from me.

I dry myself and put a pajama, then I laid again on my bed. After some minutes, Adrien comes out all wet. He dries himself and wear a pajama then sit on the couch

The bandages are wet, so I got the aid kit and sat by him.

I got his hands, and removed the bandages, then I cleaned his hands full of cuts and wounds and put the bandage again.

He was looking down and didn't look at my eyes at all. I put my hand on his jaw and forced him to look at me

Marinette: I don't want to lose you, I love you, I'm crazy in love with you. I know that I didn't let you touch me hurt you, but believe me, I will be fine soon, I'm still under shock

Adrien: don't worry, I'm not upset about that. I'm fine

Marinette: you lie, you aren't fine, you are my husband and I know when you feel fine and when you are not, tell me please

Adrien: it's hard, it's really hard and I can't accept it.

Marinette: we can't change anything now, it happened and we should take care

Adrien: I want to change this reality. I was looking at you, getting hurt by 2 monsters and I was unable to help you, I was just looking at you. I was useless, I was weak. I should protect you but I failed, I was a failure, I'm your protector, I'm your support, I'm your everything, but what I have done? Nothing. It hurt me, it killed me when I saw them touching you, touching something mine. You are just mine and you don't belong to anyone. They put their dirty hands on your skin and their shit inside you, they were rough with you, they hurted every part of your fragile body, they kissed your lips, the licked your skin, it's just.... It's just painful, I'm burning inside me, every breath is just a fire burning me inside more and more. I don't deserve you

Marinette: no, no, no you are wrong, we deserve each other, we love each other. Listen Adrien, we shouldn't let them win against us, we should be strong and stay together. I can't live without you

Adrien: I can't live without you too

Marinette: kitty, we will be fine trust me. we should move on, we can't fix it, we are together and that's it.

Adrien keeps quiet for some minutes, but I held his hands and kissed them, he didn't do anything, but after a few seconds he stand up and look at me

Adrien: I will fix that and I know how


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