My Protector

Chapter 17

Eddy

"Bonnie baby." I sobbed. What Brandy said was true. This was my fault. I knew the words I said to her at the party would hurt her. I knew that she wouldn't just go sleep with another man but I let my ego get in the way. I allowed my annoyance and jealousy brake up something that was growing so wonderful between us and because of that she was here in the hospital fighting for her life. She didn't look like herself. They had a breathing tub in her mouth. She was just laying there not moving at all. They said depending on how long she was under that water would determine if she was brain dead or not. This was all my fault. I had to make this right but how?

"Can you leave?" I heard Brandy say as she came back into the room. I turned to face her.

"I'm sorry Brandy. You're right this is my fault. It should be me laying there not her." I left the room unable to see her laying there any longer. Because of me she may not make it. Once home I lay in bed just thinking of how much of a fuck up I was. How horrible of a person I must be to hurt the person I've grown to love. I couldn't see my life without her. And without the months of spending my days with her I felt as if I've known her all my life. She was a part of me. And if she died I wouldn't be able to go on. I needed her. What was wrong with me? Sighing I sat up. Sleep wouldn't come. I knew I wouldn't be able to get any sleep at all tonight.

"You woke bro?" Allic called from the top of the steps.

"Yeah. Unfortunately." I heard as he made his way down.

"How are you feeling?"

"Horrible." He sighed. "I just don't understand. I know the words I said to her was horrible but we've been back and forth with words throughout the months. We've said some horrible things to each other and we bounced back. What was different now?"

"Maybe because you called her a whore." It wasn't until now that I realized Allic was also angry with me. I knew I truly fucked up. This man never got angry about anything.

"I know. I'm an idiot. So stupid and now she may not make it. I called her so many times. If she had picked up just once..."

"You don't answer calls when you're committing suicide." He said sarcastically. Ignoring that I said.

"I know Bonnie was battling depression but with everything she's been through she chooses my words to try to kill herself over? Why? She was raped and kidnapped and beaten but my words pushed her over the edge? That's fuckin hard to believe."

"Maybe it was because she was in love with you."

"Bonnie wasn't in love with me. It was just sex and a job to her."

"You're rude disrespectful and dumb." He said as he shook his head. "That woman spent damn near everyday with you. Even on the days she had off she was still up under your ass Eddy. Come on man even I seen the love she had for you even without looking at her everyday."

"Having love for me and being in love with me are two different things."

"I guess you are dumb." He said and I sucked my teeth.

"Stop playing."

"I'm serious. This woman was kidnapped and had a concussion almost dying and who is the first person she think of when she wakes up? You. Who did she come and see when they let her go? You. Who was she staying with? You. She cooked and cleaned for you. Took care of you. She was your nurse and your physical therapist."