Tragic Harmony

Chapter Twenty- Seven

That next morning before anyone was awake I went down to the cafeteria to grab us all some coffee and when I got back upstairs everyone was awake, Spongebob was playing on the Tv, the curtains were opened and Luke was sitting on the edge of Ryan’s bed watching Spongebob. I handed out the coffee then told them I would be back I was going to see if the boys were here yet. To my surprise they were already walking up the hallway as I was walking down to find them.

“Ali! How are they? How are you? Is everything okay?” Noah blurted out before I even got to say hello.

“Everyone’s good they are all just waiting for you guys to come in so let’s get a move on!”

I managed to avoid eye contact with Jason until we got into the room but I quickly turned my attention to Ryan, I didn’t want to deal with him right now.

“Hey Ryan look who it is!” I yelled walking into the room with the boys.

“Wowz you the gazes!” Ryan shrieked as Luke turned off the Tv.

“Hey Ryan I’m Noah, that’s Jason, Jack, and Finn, and we are the gaze!”

“sing sing sing sing sing!!!” Ryan squealed

The boys laughed and they started to sing. As they sang I told myself to just enjoy it. Don’t think of the past. After the first couple of songs they started singing “fighter”. My body tensed and my breaths came quicker. Suddenly all the memories from that night slapped me in the face. Forgetting where I was and who I was with. I let out a broken sob. I grabbed my stomach and leaned over. Everyone just stared at me until I felt a hand on my back. It was Luke. He grabbed my hand and quickly leading me out of the room leaving everyone in shock.

He led me to the hallway“Ali, this was a bad idea. Come here.” He pulled me into a hug.

"Im so sorry! I just...that was....I miss her Luke."

I couldn’t control my tears. “Shh Ali it’s okay. It’s okay.” Luke said rubbing my back.

“Ali look at me.” Luke grabbed my face and forced me to look in his eyes. “You are strong Ali. You can do this. I’m right here, your safe.”

I took a few deep breaths letting his words sink in. 

Hearing his words calmed me down. “Thanks.” I whispered. “I’m sorry. I ruin everything.”

“Ali, you didn’t ruin anything! You don’t need to be sorry! It’s okay to show your feelings!” He smiled at me.

“Thanks.” I whispered once again.

He leaned down and kissed me on the lips. “Okay….let’s go back in.” I said trying to smile but failing.

I walked in and everyone was quiet and awkward. I looked at everyone’s confused faces and I then knew that I had to tell them. I had to tell them the truth.

“Ali? Are you okay? What’s wrong? Is it the song? We can sing something else?” Noah said soothingly moving toward me.

“No, no, I’m fine it’s just… I need to tell you guys something…” I said sitting on the edge of Ryan’s bed who then sat on my lap.

Luke turned to me and said “Ali you don’t have to…”

“I know i dont, but they deserve to know the truth.” I said turning back to the boys.

I started telling them the story about being a huge fan getting concert tickets for my birthday and going to the concert. I Laughed when I talked about Lucy, mom, and I taking pictures and singing along. Then it got to the hard part.

“After the concert, it had snowed a lot, the roads were slippery. We were driving home and next thing I knew I saw a limo heading straight for us. There was nothing we could do.” I let out a small cry. “My mom with the force of impact.”. I managed to make it through most of it without crying to much, but I just couldn’t help it. I looked up still crying and to my surprise I saw Jason get up and leave the room.. I turned to Noah and gave him a confused look 

"Ali i am so sorry. We didnt know. Im sos sorrty that happened to you." Finn said. 

The wrest of the boys pulled me into a hug only making me cry harder. 

“Hey guys I’ll be right back. Entertain Ryan would you?” I said wiping my tears. 

I walked out of the room and looked around for Jason and saw him sitting on the floor down the hallway. I walked down and stood in front of him.

“What’s your problem? Like seriously I just told you everything and you just walk out? You don’t even say anything?! I’m sick and tired of your crap Jason! I can’t take it anymore!”

He looked up and I gasped. I could see tears in his eyes.  I think right then was the first time I’ve seen any guy cry.

I bent down in front of him. “Jason?” i whispered. 

“I’m… I’m sorry.” He whispered. looking down.

“It’s okay...” I said hesitantly.

“I mean I’m really bad at talking about my feelings and shit but I’m really sorry Ali. I feel so bad, I’ve treated you  like shit and its actually been my fault all along for you being so angry with us.”

“It’s okay. You didn’t know.” I said sitting next to him.

“It doesn’t matter….I treated you like crap. I can’t even….I just….” He struggled for words. This is the first time I have ever seen Jason showing raw emotion. I knew he was sorry, and upset. I knew he cared.

“Shhh.” I said putting my finger to his mouth. “I know.”

I pulled him into a hug. He tensed in surprise but then relaxed and moved his arms around me. “I’m so sorry Ali. You don’t deserve this.” He whispered in my ear. 

I turned to him and giving him a small smile and letting yet another tear escape my eyes. "I know." i whispered. 

I put my head on his shoulder and just relaxed. I was mentally and emotionaly exauhsted. I couldnt wrap my brain all the events of the past days. I breathed in his scent and felt warmth spread through my body. I dont know how long we stayed like this but soon Luke walked up and told us Ryan was ready to be realsed. 

We all went our seperate ways and when we got home we all crashed after the exaushting events.