Mafia Kingpin: A Dark, Thrilling Organized Crime Romance

193

It was time for me to leave jail, and I was ecstatic. I was feeling a rush of a million emotions at once, and it felt so damn overwhelming. Just standing at the reception and looking at the door with the anticipation that I would finally be seeing the light of day again made my eyes brim with tears. Five years locked in a box... over 1825 days, and it had come to an end. It felt surreal.

I collected all of the things the cops had taken off me when I first came; my phone, my headphones, my keys, and signed out at the reception.

"Here's all your stuff, kid," said the cop, handing me all of my belongings in a massive box.

"Thank you," I sighed, with my hands on my hips. It felt like I was in a dream. I could barely make sense of everything that was going on. The past five years felt like a blur because all that I could see now was the future... I'd come into jail an immature teenager, and came out of it a man.

Before I knew it, I was making my way out of the station, opening the door... And then finally hit daylight. The wind blew in my face, and it felt amazing. Phenomenal. Words couldn't explain this feeling... A feeling that I used to take for granted. I couldn't believe it. I was out. I was out!

Freedom at last.

I opened up my phone, flicking open my music playlist. It felt so good to have my phone back; my proper phone. I'd forgotten what it was like to plug in my earphones and just enjoy some good music and good, happy vibes. I could do with listening to a bit of my favourite rapper, Bugzy Malone. I clicked on to the song San Andreas Mentality.

And when I look back shit's changed. I remember sitting playing my computer games. San Andreas had me feeling I could rob a bank, and drag a man out of his car with my bare hands. Marijuana had me sitting on the clouds so my perception was foggy, I'm not saying I was proud to have a name in the bits before I ever spat a bar, I made the Ninja go sick before I ever drove a car.

Year nine, we had a nine, it wasn't mine, Fidz held up a shizzer and got time, a year down the line I'm in a good position. The hood knows I'm a banger so I started getting high. And Fidz got out of jail, I looked him in his eye and I could tell that wasn't my jigga, it made me wanna cry. He made me feel little, for him I woulda died, but from the day he dissed me I just wasn't on his side.

So I tried to stop blazing and strengthen my mind. I just wished that Darkee woulda stayed on my side. Then come a stroke of luck, I'm sitting in the dock. My San Andreas mentality had fucked me up and now they're tryna lock me up. My mummy left the courtroom crying so I'm looking at the man that brought me up. No we're not the same colour, but I love him like a dad and even though I diss him he's the only thing I had. So I just hope that he forgives me for the violence, I was in a bad place, seen the devil a couple times and stared death in the face. I remember sitting in that sweatbox, feeling out of place, while everybody's shouting I was picturing my mum's face.

Then we arrived at that jail, the atmosphere was different. Yeah I'd seen a police cell, but I'd never seen a prison. I was only 16, in a terrible position and you wonder why I've got a defensive mechanism? Listen, I don't condone any of my past, all I know is I was young and living fast. Four months down the line, I had the wing on smash, cus' I put on a size, no sign of a moustache. And then they let me out, what a beautiful day, cuh my future looked bright but the sky was grey. Hah, trust my mummy to be 20 minutes late, I've just been released, left hanging at the prison gates. And then they pulled up, my little sister jumped out, Mummy got emotional, we hugged for like five whole minutes...

I switched off the song abruptly. It was crazy how much the lyrics fitted my life right now. Bugzy was making up with his mum when he'd been released from jail, and I knew that I had to do the same. Instead of ringing Ijaz, I started walking to the bus station, ready to catch a bus to take me back to my ends.